1 Grandma, 1 Teenager, 1 20Some­thing... An­swer Your Most Burn­ing Love Ques­tions!

An­swer Your Most Burn­ing LOVE QUES­TIONS! Got a re­la­tion­ship is­sue and the bestie has no more an­swers? We got three gen­er­a­tions of women to play agony aunt for you—some of their an­swers may sur­prise you!

Cosmopolitan (India) - - CONTENTS - As told to Priyam Chaturvedi

1 I’d like to meet new men, but don’t know how to ap­proach them with­out com­ing across as des­per­ate.

Me­herangez: “Go out with your friends, and don’t feel shy to join con­ver­sa­tions with new peo­ple. Read the news­pa­per head­lines in the morn­ing, as they could be a good con­ver­sa­tion starters.”

Nikhita: “Ap­proach­ing peo­ple with the hope of a pos­si­ble ro­man­tic fu­ture will make you awk­ward. In­stead, fo­cus on mak­ing new friends and see how that goes.”

Malvika: “Firstly, take out the gen­der bar­rier from your head. Meet ev­ery new guy like you’d meet your girl­friends—in an hon­est, con­fi­dent and fun way. That will ease the pres­sure.”

2 I’m dat­ing a younger guy and keep feel­ing weird about it...

Me­herangez: “There is noth­ing wrong about go­ing out with a younger guy. But do ask your­self some im­por­tant ques­tions: is he se­ri­ous about the re­la­tion­ship? Does he take care of you? And most im­por­tantly, is he com­mit­ted?”

Nikhita: “It’s fine to date some­one younger. It’s not age that mat­ters but how ma­turely he han­dles the re­la­tion­ship.”

Malvika: “Age is the last thing that should bother you! It’s all about how much fun, crazi­ness and love you can man­age to­gether.”

3 I broke up with my boyfriend be­cause he was mov­ing to another city, and we both thought we couldn’t man­age a LDR. But now I miss him. What should I do?

Me­herangez: “Go out with other friends and then see. Do you miss him out of habit? Give your­self some time be­fore you de­cide.”

Nikhita: “Liv­ing in dif­fer­ent cities might not al­ways be a bad thing. Yes, you don’t get to meet as

of­ten, but other than that you have so many ways to com­mu­ni­cate, like Skype, Face­book, What­sApp, etc. If you’re not in the same city, you also end up giv­ing each other some space, which is of­ten re­quired to make a re­la­tion­ship work. So it might just strengthen your bond.”

Malvika: “Long dis­tance is the tough­est test for a re­la­tion­ship, ever! You may miss your boyfriend be­cause you are used to him be­ing around, so give it some more time. And if you re­ally want to be with him, men­tally pre­pare your­self for some try­ing times and know that when you come out of this phase tri­umphant, it will be the strong­est bond ever.”

4 I’m in a rather cliché sit­u­a­tion—my par­ents don’t like my boyfriend and don’t want me to be with him. How can I make them see what a great guy he is?

Me­herangez: “Don’t for­get that your fam­ily has brought you up, so they may have very real rea­sons for not lik­ing him. Talk to them and ex­plain that you would like them to get to know your friend be­cause their lack of sup­port is damp­en­ing your hap­pi­ness.”

Nikhita: “Since your par­ents have gone through this phase of life they might be right. But ‘might’ is the word to fo­cus on here. Sit them down and ask them what it is about your boyfriend that they don’t like, and try rea­son­ing it out with them. Also, talk to your boyfriend about the things that are both­er­ing your par­ents. Then take an in­formed de­ci­sion.”

Malvika: “All par­ents think their daugh­ters de­serve Prince Charm­ing, and the key to han­dling par­ents with boyfriends is time and pa­tience. Let them get used to your man and with time they will get to know him bet­ter.”

5 I broke up with my boyfriend be­cause I found out he was cheat­ing on me. Now, af­ter three months, he is beg­ging for for­give­ness. Should I take him back?

Me­herangez: “No! For­get about him. Re­mem­ber, this crack will al­ways be there and may come back to haunt you if the re­la­tion­ship sours in any way.”

Nikhita: “If he cheated on you once, he could do it again. So get­ting back with him shouldn’t be an op­tion. Re­mem­ber, even if you take him back, you’ll al­ways have trust is­sues. So, no!”

Malvika: “There is no such thing as right and wrong here. If you re­ally want to be with him, de­spite what hap­pened, then that would be the right thing to do! There’s no joy in do­ing what is sup­pos­edly ‘right’, while you’re feel­ing all mis­er­able and sorry in­side!” ...........................................................

6 I’ve been talk­ing to a guy who is see­ing some­one else. Though he never says nice things about her, I feel guilty...

Me­herangez: “Avoid him! If he can speak ill about his cur­rent part­ner, then he’s not a good guy.”

Nikhita: “You’re just talk­ing to him! You shouldn’t feel re­spon­si­ble for what­ever it is that’s hap­pen­ing be­tween him and his girl­friend. He’s a friend and you like talk­ing to him. So keep do­ing that!”

Malvika: “Love is all about tak­ing chances, so if you like him, go for it and stop wor­ry­ing.” ...........................................................

7 I think my best friend is fall­ing for me. I don’t like him like that, but don’t want to lose him...

Me­herangez: “Ex­plain that you like him as a friend but don’t have any ro­man­tic feel­ings to­wards him. Be hon­est and firm.”

Nikhita: “If he is your best friend, he will un­der­stand. Dat­ing some­one even though you don’t like them is un­fair to both him and you. And if it doesn’t work out, it’ll still make things awk­ward. Do what you re­ally want to do and not some­thing that you think you are sup­posed to do.”

Malvika: “It will be tough for him, but you have to tell him up­front that you don’t feel the same way. Yes, he may be up­set for a bit, but even­tu­ally, he’ll get over it.”

Lis­ten­ing to grandma about or­der­ing ‘date fries’ was a good move

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