IF THEY INSIST, TAKE THE PROFIT

Pico Iyer, British travel writer, penned, "If we do away with semicolons, parentheses and much else, we will lose all music, nuance and subtlety in communication -- and end up shouting at one another in block capitals."

If you and your partner have recently taken up two-over-one game-force, there is one nuance that you might not have met yet. Look at today's West hand. You open one spade, North passes, East responds two hearts (natural and game-forcing), and South intervenes with three diamonds. What would you do now?

Either your side reaches at least game, or the opponents are doubled for penalty. So, here a pass is forcing, and double is for penalty -- and I think you

a should double three diamonds. If partner has a distributional hand and thinks offense is better than defense, he can overrule you. On this deal, East will worry about his unannounced three-card spade support, but he does have three diamonds and a soft hand with a lot of losers. He should pass.

The penalty is humongous! West leads his heart. East takes two tricks, then leads the heart three (low asking for a club return). West ruffs and leads a low club, East winning two tricks there before playing a further heart (or a trump). West will take another trick with his diamond ace, then puts South into his hand, forcing him to lead away from the spade king.

The defenders take two spades, two hearts, one diamond, two clubs and a heart ruff for down four, plus 1100!

Yes, four spades can be made, but it takes good guesswork and is worth only 620.