It’s time to have some fun. Your goal is to stimulate adrenaline, dopamine, all those hormones that give you a high and lead to sexual arousal. GET TURNED ON Watch erotic videos together as a warmup, to enrich lovemaking, not undermine it. Give her the remote and tell her she can turn it off at any time. GET INNOVATIVE. In your nightstand, store a lubricant that can double as massage oil, such as K-Y Touch Massage 2-in-1 (ky.com), and the book 101Grrreat Quickies, by Laura Corn. Instructions for each quickie are in a sort of envelope that must be “unzipped” – good for shy couples. TRY A SIMPLE TRICK. Cover her vulva with your hand and apply steady pressure to increase bloodflow. Everything you do afterward will feel better. GO SLOW. Don’t make an expedition of finding her G-spot, and don’t go too far or too fast. Insert a finger into her vagina no farther than your second knuckle. Wrap your finger around her pelvic bone and then slowly rock your hand until she starts to rock with you. Stay shallow, create a slow, throbbing sensation, and be gentle.