Par­ent­ing

Ac­tor, RJ and pro­ducer Tee­jay Sidhu’s par­ent­ing mantras

Health & Nutrition - - CONTENTS - TR­ISHA DAN­GAR­WALA

How has moth­er­hood changed you as a per­son?

Moth­er­hood has brought out the child in me! Ev­ery day I am play­ing games, singing songs, do­ing lit­tle dances, and re­view­ing num­bers and ABCs. Chil­dren live com­pletely in the mo­ment. If they’re happy, they laugh. If they’re up­set, they cry. If they need you, they’ll let you know they need at­ten­tion from you. I love that hon­esty about them. I’ve learned to live more in the mo­ment, and not stress too much about silly lit­tle things.

How do you bal­ance your pro­fes­sional life along with be­ing a mom of twins?

I’m for­tu­nate to be work­ing in the en­ter­tain­ment in­dus­try ver­sus a nine-five cor­po­rate kind of job. My hours and shoot dates are not stress­ful, and when­ever I’m shoot­ing, whether it’s for TV, dig­i­tal or for an ad, I take my chil­dren along with me. They play with each other, they ex­plore their new sur­round­ings, and when they feel like sleep­ing, they go to my van­ity van, where there’s a bed ready for them. I had a nice van­ity van while shoot­ing for First­post’s ‘9 Months’ where my chil­dren could sleep when they needed to. My twins are such pleas­ant lit­tle girls, and they adapt very quickly to new sur­round­ings. I’m glad be­cause it’s made it so easy for me to go back to work.

What has ‘9 Months’ taught you as a mother?

Be­ing a host for ‘9 Months Sea­son 3’ has given me the op­por­tu­nity to speak with many spe­cial­ists – pe­di­a­tri­cians, nu­tri­tion­ists, psy­chol­o­gists etc. I re­ceived a lot of in­sight into rais­ing chil­dren, and also asked many ques­tions that I, as a mother of tod­dlers, had. I also got a chance to speak one-on-one to other par­ents in the en­ter­tain­ment in­dus­try. It was in­ter­est­ing to see how they bal­anced their ca­reers with work,

and how they han­dled prob­lems that came up.

How does your hus­band Karan­vir Bohra help you with tak­ing care of the chil­dren? Karan­vir is the most amaz­ing fa­ther, and has never made me feel that rais­ing chil­dren is only a mother’s job. He changes di­a­pers, feeds ba­bies, cooks for them, en­ter­tains them, takes them to the park - ev­ery­thing that I do, he does. He is the most hand­son dad I have ever seen. He was there for ev­ery scan, ev­ery doc­tor’s ap­point­ment, and told me right from the be­gin­ning that he wanted to be a part of the en­tire jour­ney with me. The ba­bies are so close to him. I love that Karan­vir is build­ing these strong emo­tional bonds with our chil­dren. I feel these solid foun­da­tions from early on help shape chil­dren into kind, lov­ing adults who are able to choose healthy re­la­tion­ships in their lives later on.

What are your thoughts on di­vid­ing par­ent­ing re­spon­si­bil­i­ties? I think it’s not fair for moth­ers to be the sole care-givers. Both par­ents should be in­volved in rais­ing a child and that means han­dling re­spon­si­bil­i­ties equally. I think the prob­lems arise when women take too much on them­selves and don’t speak up when they need help. Maybe men don’t know that their help is even re­quired. So it’s nice to be hon­est with your hus­band, and let him know how he can make your life a lit­tle eas­ier.

Any ad­vice for new moms of twins? Try not to do ev­ery­thing your­selves and to take lit­tle breaks when­ever you can. You don’t need to be a su­per­woman. Ask your in­laws and ex­tended fam­ily for help from time to time so you can recharge too. Don’t let the re­spon­si­bil­ity of han­dling two ba­bies make you un­happy be­cause, be­lieve me, there will be days where you feel like it’s just too much to han­dle! Chil­dren are very sen­si­tive to our vi­bra­tions - if we’re happy, they’re happy. If we’re stressed out, they will feel ag­i­tated. Stay as pos­i­tive as you can. Also med­i­tate and breathe deeply when you can. It helps more than you know!

Karan­vir is the most amaz­ing fa­ther, and has never made me feel that rais­ing chil­dren is only a mother’s job.

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