Hindustan Times - Brunch : 2019-02-10

Humour : 8 : 8

Humour

HUMOUR 8 OH LOVE, WHERE ART THOU? The Valentine season is a difficult time for those who’ve lost love or are looking for it WHEN I’M SIXTY-FOUR February 14 isn’t kind to the Lonely Hearts Club By Rehana Munir When I get older losing my hair Many years from now Will you still be sending me a valentine Birthday greetings, bottle of wine? work in peace, now that my love life is in order.” As if love takes up permanent residence in one’s heart, never to feel neglected, put upon or distracted. Then there are those extravagant anniversary celebrations where eternally warring spouses assume the superior air of Zen masters. Kahlil Gibran’s mystical wisdom is spouted, fancy hors d’oeuvres served and vows renewed. The hours before and celebrations, where everyone appears terminally happy in their carefully curated love bubbles. A good love story often involves a change of heart. Let me leave you with an image of two people walking in a park at sunset, hand in hand. One is my aunt; the other is her husband, who’s had a heart transplant a little over a year ago. The last few years have been trying in every way possible, but here they are – here they still are. Watching them take slow steps together in the golden light reminds me that our search for companionship, no matter how old or world weary we may be, is more than worthwhile. (My uncle turned 64 this January.) Meanwhile, if you’re looking for a persuasive V-Day argument to convince someone, the lads from Liverpool have still got it. develops carpal tunnel syndrome from all the swiping and chatting but is no closer to finding a date, leave alone a beloved. One friend, who recently found love on Tinder, told me it was her last day scouring the male category. She was ready to jump over to the other side when she finally met her current companion. Another friend hit it off with someone on a dating app, and after many a hurdle, the couple N obody says it like The Beatles. The quoted song, part of the Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band album, released in 1967, features a dogged young man looking to secure the companionship of his lover well into the future. The angle is not limited to British boy bands alone. Any Indian single beyond the age of 30 is regularly subjected to doomsday scenarios involving lonesome senior years staring into the abyss, lamenting one’s failure to find a “permanent” soulmate. WHETHER LOOKING FOR SOMEONE TO GROW OLD WITH, OR TO WATCH NETFLIX WITH, IT’S BEST TO NOT RESPOND TO SOCIAL MEDIA TRIGGERS budhaape ka sahaara after these celebrations often feature some first-rate marital manoeuvres that may easily be described as martial. But long marriages = happy marriages, we’re taught. Fortunately, the “feeling blessed” hashtag covers all manner of sins. have moved in together. So it does exist – the happy ending to the Tinderella story. Except, everyone knows that the real story begins at “happily ever after.” YOU MUST HAVE BABIES CHANGE OF HEART I could be handy, mending a fuse When your lights have gone You can knit a sweater by the fireside Sunday mornings go for a ride Doing the garden, digging the weeds Who could ask for more Will you still need me, will you still feed me When I’m sixty-four Marriage, parenthood and pet adoption – speak to anyone who’s recently experienced one of these and you’re in danger of being sucked into the splendiferous world yourself. I’m convinced there’s some multi-level marketing racket around these life events. You pull in more people and you get rewarded somehow. “Oh, it will change your life!” they tell you, flashing a diamond ring while pulling a pram or a leash. “I can really focus on my The valentine season is a difficult time for those who’ve lost love, or who’re reassessing it. Like Joni Mitchell in so many of us – perhaps all – really don’t know love at all. But whether we’re looking for someone to grow old with, or someone to watch Netflix with (which, I’ve learnt, can be a euphemism for other couchrelated activities), it’s perhaps best not to respond to triggers like social media, or anniversary TINDERELLA & PRINCE TRENDING Clouds, Blinded by images of eternal Insta bliss, the young seeker launches Operation Soulmate. Like two Disprin in a glass of water on a hungover morning, she or he is ready to mingle. February 14 is nigh and it’s down to the trusty Internet to find the elusive soulmate. One quickly [email protected] Follow @HTBrunch on Twitter FEBRUARY 10, 2019 PRINTED AND DISTRIBUTED BY PRESSREADER PressReader.com +1 604 278 4604 ORIGINAL COPY . ORIGINAL COPY . ORIGINAL COPY . ORIGINAL COPY . ORIGINAL COPY . ORIGINAL COPY COPYRIGHT AND PROTECTED BY APPLICABLE LAW

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