The only manly thing to do is to beg for her forgiveness

After getting drunk at a party a friend started making out with me. I, too, was drunk, and gave in. Later, my girlfriend found out and broke up with me, How can I get her back?

RS Fabien the less Elder wrote, ‘a drunken favour deserves another’. RS, ask your girl to wipe the state clean, by getting drunk and making out with someone. However, this approach probably won’t work in 2018. Someone will stream the event live, your girlfriend will become the next Kim Kardashian, and you’ll be forgotten forever. The only manly thing to do is to beg for her forgiveness, consistently and constantly. Beg, and be patient. At the party you were a chooser. Now you’ll be reduced to being a beggar. And remember, beggars cannot ever be choosers

My boyfriend of one year broke up with me for no reason. Now, after a long time, I’m ready to move on. But he recently messaged me that he’s willing to start dating me again. Please help.

KS KS, there are two parts to your situation. Part one is that a year has passed. Lewis and Hamilton’s Guide to the Modern Heart points out that seven months and 22 days is the average time needed for the heart to mend in modern times. The heart, in fact, mends faster than the liver, but slowly than the kidney. Hence love more with your liver than with your heart, and never with the kidney. So, one year is good enough. The second part is while you finally want to move on, the old flame wants you back. The answer is obvious, do you want him back? Whatever you do, don’t rush back. Make him earn it. See how far he’s willing to go.

I’ve liked a guy for more than a year and we started chatting two months back on WhatsApp. Now, I want to call him. But I’ve nothing to talk to him. What do I talk to him about?

TA TA, have you lost your memory? For two months, you are chatting with him. I’m presuming your chats are not limited to ‘Wassup?’ and ‘Cool!’ So, continue chatting the same way as you text... When you call him, have your subjects ready for action. For instance, you could talk about (a) Fuel hikes, (b) How does the hike affect Vijay Mallya as he lives in England? (c) Ganpati, and (d) Your common friend Dushyanti’s body odour. On second thoughts, don’t mention the fuel hike; it may put him into depression. Once you start talking you’ll be surprised to see how the conversation grows… er, just like the fuel prices.

A girl in my college started talking to me about a year ago; I wasn’t interested, so I ignored her. Often, she just stares at me. Though now I have started finding her cute, she doesn’t talk to me. But her friends look at me and laugh. Is this a signal that she likes me?

RV RV, the best part of your question is the part where the friends look at you and laugh. I find that fascinating. Now, is it a giggle? A downpour d of laughter? See R RVjee, if she s stares at you, you think she’s cute, plus the friends all know, then we’ve enough to go with. w We can start construction c of the building. b We can open the batting. We can give a down payment...p Take advantage a of the green g signal. You never know a Naka Bandhi may be lurking around the corner.