Getting to know daughter in a whole new way
IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE, SHE SEEMS TO HAVE TRANSFORMED FROM MY BABY TO A YOUNG ADULT WITH PROFOUND VIEWPOINTS
My younger daughter and I barely noticed the pounding of the winter rain on the window pane; we were too engrossed by the YouTube video we had come across of my great- and her great-great-grandfather’s house in pre-Partition India that is now Pakistan. It was as fascinating to her young eyes as it was to mine. As we watched the story about the hundred-year-old house, we felt one with our roots. She asked me various questions about Partition. Why did it happen? What happened to the people who lost everything? What turns friends into foes? Her curiosity and empathy for all those who lost so much caught me by surprise. Later, I pondered if I had that insight at 14. Probably not.
Over the past few months, as we discuss the upcoming US elections and our shared horror at the possibility of Donald Trump becoming the next US President, the spread of ISIS all over the globe, and the critical analysis of the latest Star Wars movie, I realise with amazement that I’m starting to get to know my younger daughter in a whole new way. In the blink of an eye, she seems to have transformed from my baby to a young adult with profound viewpoints and strong opinions. Could it have been that I was so involved in helping my older daughter reach her milestones that I didn’t realise that the baby of the family was turning into a young woman?
Just when I am blown away by her insight, she does something that is so typical of a 14-year old that I am brought back to reality with a thud. Like any teenager, she is trying to find herself. Her eclectic fashion sense makes me cringe, but then I remember my own mother’s horror at the style of fashion I had in my teens. My generation growing up in Chandigarh was the “wannabe” Americans. We watched American movies, and took our role models from teen movies like ‘Grease’ and ‘Ferris Bueller’s Day Off ’. We read Archie comics and all the girls wanted to be Betty or Veronica. Madonna and Cyndi Lauper inspired our sense of clothing. In our minds we were living the American lifestyle in Chandigarh.
One forgets the ways of the young so easily. Like most parents of today, I wonder how does this generation study while chatting with friends and watching YouTube videos? Then I think of the days when I would study with my Sony Walkman glued to my ears and my mother would wonder the same thing.
Just the other day it was with a touch of envy that my elder daughter remarked that her younger sibling is so busy climbing up the ranks of popularity that she has little time for anyone. I agree. Much as I am enjoying my daughter’s steps into maturity, I do miss the little girl who would want to stay up all night to catch a glimpse of the tooth fairy and would put out cookies and milk by the fireplace for Santa Claus every Christmas. She would trail behind her elder sister and her cool friends, wanting to be just like them.