Stop cribbing and savour the moment
In a get-together that I recently attended, I found all of us complaining; a friend grumbled about the mercury peaking and the aggressive behaviour of kids these days. A couple who reached late griped about the heavy traffic. A group of youngsters brooded over difficult career choices. Children at the function whined that with no entertaining games, they were getting bored.
Back home, I was compelled to contemplate whether we were increasingly becoming a generation of complainers. We’ve become so attuned to complaining that we don’t know how much we enjoy dancing to its rhythm, whether it is weather, traffic, career, classmates, colleagues, friends or family.
Complaining is being so dissatisfied with whatever is presented in the moment that you can’t actually see what is happening. At home or at the workplace when things go wrong, blame game begins as the cause of disruption. We begin accusing one another or trying to find a scapegoat. Seen through a faulty and biased prism, the issue remains unsolved and unresolved. Every possible move is viewed with suspicion. Energy, which could have been put to better use, is spent on endless complaining.
Governed by our whims, we are constantly consumed by the noise of complaining. It was frustration at the end of a hard day at work, which made me sit down to brood. Suddenly, a maxim that governed the life of my parents rang in my ears, “The greatest wealth is to live content with little.”
Filled with a sense of guilt I began to count my blessings. My spirits got bolstered. The heaviness of the heart receded, clouds of frustration made way for lightness.
Frustration or constant complaining generally stems from our unwillingness to lend an ear to prudence. We wake up to a deluge of positive quotes forwarded on Whatsapp, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter etc, and spend the day swamped by unrealistic lessons. Apt are the words of Eugene O’Neill who said, “Obsessed by a fairy tale, we spend our lives searching for a magic door and a lost kingdom of peace”. We remain in a state of dissatisfaction. While to aim for the stars is important for the progress of society, we must temper our expectations and be content.
The problem is that we are so preoccupied with individualism and quick-fix solutions that we plumb the depths of despair on petty issues that may never cross our memory ever afterwards. We are living in the culture of ‘we never have enough’. In short, we strive for thinner, cleverer, richer, and better versions of ourselves. It is only natural for us to always try and put our perfect face forward. But life doesn’t work that way. The constant pressure for self improvement has an adverse effect on us.
So every time you feel like complaining, check yourself and become aware of any undue cravings or unrealistic ideals. Just focus on acceptance. You’ll feel lighter, more joyous and contented. This energy will also radiate to those around you. Try it and see how it works wonders.
My family’s mantra is whatever happens, happens for best. Pull yourself by your shoestrings and sing with Victorian novelist Charles Dickens, who had said, “Reflect upon your present blessings of which every man has many, not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some”.
EVERY TIME YOU FEEL LIKE COMPLAINING, CHECK YOURSELF AND BECOME AWARE OF ANY UNDUE CRAVINGS OR UNREALISTIC IDEALS. JUST FOCUS ON ACCEPTANCE. YOU’LL FEEL LIGHTER, MORE JOYOUS AND CONTENTED