International Men’s Day: Of manhood, masculinity and mental well-being

Celebrated globally on November 19 (today), International Men’s Day recognises and celebrates the achievements and contributions of men. The broader aim of the day is to create greater awareness of men’s issues that are often sidelined. Keeping this year’s theme — helping men and boys — in mind, we speak to experts about the various mental health issues men suffer from and stereotypes attached to it. They also tell us different ways to help the men in our lives.

Men are frequently advised to appear stronger, less frail, and less emotional, which might prevent them from opening up about their issues. “Although there may be some validity to these stereotypes, genderbased expectations for behaviour can be detrimental, particularly when it comes to mental health. A study indicated that people’s reactions to other people’s mental problems were influenced by gender stereotypes,” says Jyoti Kapoor, senior psychiatrist and founder of Manasthali.

Seconding this, says Minakshi Manchanda, psychiatry specialist, Asian Hospital, says, “Irrespective of their gender, society’s expectations of men to be strong, dominant and independent makes it harder for them to open up and reach out for help.” Manchanda elaborates further, “But it’s important to know that men report lower levels of life satisfaction than women and use harmful coping methods like drugs, alcohol, etc. more frequently. Most men never speak about their mental health to anyone. Some are embarrassed to speak about it, some are afraid of stigma and others have thoughts of suicide or self-harm if they are compelled to seek professional help.”

Stress impacts every individual in a different way. However, there are studies that prove that men and women have different psychological and biological responses to stress. “In comparison to women, men have a stronger stress response and may react with higher levels of aggression and more unhealthy coping behaviours, all of which can impact them physically and psychologically, both having an interrelated relationship. Symptoms of physical stress in men include chest pain, pounding heart, high blood pressure, fatigue and more,” adds Kapoor.

A majority of our society still believes that men crying or being emotional is a sign of weakness.*

Rahul Rai Kakkar, psychiatrist, Sanar International Hospitals, Gurugram suggests that before thinking about “how crying can be made normal among men”, we have to think why is it not considered to be normal in the first place? “Letting out tears is a great way to release hurt, sadness or any intense feeling and help you stay balanced. When you cry, you let the emotions go, it helps you feel better. Once we encourage men to acknowledge painful emotions with honesty, it will be easier to manage their mental health,” says Kakkar.

We need to break the stereotypes and create an open environment to help men.

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