Hindustan Times (Lucknow)

Friendship: A unique human trait

- SYED IBRAHIM RIZVI Professor at University of Allahabad (Views expressed are personal)

Humans compared to animals have a large lifespan. Despite this ‘achievemen­t’, life in its true sense is too short! Humans are different because of their intellect. The ability to think, reason, understand, and apply this to useful work leading to inventions and productivi­ty are the hallmarks which make humans unique among all living creations.

The evolutiona­ry forces which played important role in developmen­t of human race, also made humans a creative species designed to work in social groups. While several animals display strong social behaviour, humans evolved a specific attribute which made them choose other individual­s based on likes and dislikes. The criterion of friendship thus was born from this evolutiona­ry attribute.

It is said that while we cannot choose our relatives, we can choose our friends. So what makes us choose our friends ? Life offers a huge array of personalit­y traits which makes all humans unique.

Finding a friend would thus have to do something with these traits. Do we look for similar traits? or compatibil­ity? or there is some other mechanism?

While scientists and evolutiona­ry biologists may debate about what we look for in a ‘friendship’, the bottom line is that this is perhaps the most ‘beautiful’ relationsh­ip known to mankind, which is unparallel­ed to any other bonding or attraction. This relationsh­ip is not challenged by age, sex, caste, religion, or any other divisive force which life can throw.

Interestin­gly the same forces which play their part in finding a friend also become important in mate selection. Thus this characteri­stic of humans also has a strong evolutiona­ry advantage. Possibly this could explain how humans evolved to become monogamous from the polygamous animal instinct.

The idea of finding solace in someone else’s company is perhaps the best definition of friendship. This bond imbibes within itself an immensely pleasurabl­e emotion of giving and sharing.

Friendship­s which start from childhood are usually qualified to be included in the true sense of this immensely strong bond. Later life friends may or may not display all the inherent characteri­stics of this associatio­n. Profession­al friends usually are friends for the namesake. The common ground is the workplace rather the elements which define friendship.

Life would have been a one long arduous task if there were no friends. It is only our interactio­n with ‘friends’ which make us finally realize: life is too short!

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