The long hug controversy exposes a fake morality
Kerala can be regressively puritanical, ambitiously progressive and mindlessly violent, all at the same time
Kerala has a problem. Many in fact. And the latest is the row over a hug between two students in a school in the capital Thiruvananthapuram. A Class 12 boy hugs a Class 11 girl congratulating her for her recital of a song. A teacher takes objection to the “long hug” as it “violates school discipline”. The school management summons the parents of the two and allegedly humiliates them. The child rights commission supports the students, but the Kerala High Court is convinced by the school’s argument. Sadly, the court’s decision is disappointing.
Kerala, the large urban village that it is, is struggling to co-exist with the modernity it aspires to achieve without letting go of the petty prudishness it prides itself for. The row over the “long hug” reflects this. Earlier, a Kerala police chief suggested that a man staring at a woman for more than 14 seconds could land in jail. Now a “long hug” is problematic.
Kerala, it would seem, has a multiple personality disorder, more like the three characters actor Vikram plays in the 2005 Tamil/ Hindi film Anniyan. Kerala can be regressively puritanical, ambitiously progressive and mindlessly violent, all at the same time.
How else can one explain the following: Kerala has the highest alcohol consumption per capita in India, but, it refuses to acknowledge that it has a drinking problem. At the height of the ‘beef ban’ controversy, Kerala held beef fests to stress the importance of the freedom of choice. Yet, a majority didn’t bat an eyelid at the cruel ways used to address the stray dog menace. The 2014 Kiss of Love protests, against moral policing, began in Kerala, but the state was quick to accept the love jihad bogey, the Hadiya case being an example. Kerala has the envious distinction of voting to power one of the earliest elected communist governments in the world; it is also home to many ultra-orthodox religious groups.
This “long hug” controversy is a manifestation of a flaw that runs through the fully literate state: Fake morality. A sex ratio of 1.084 is a matter of pride, but on women’s safety it has a long way to go. An indicator of this is to check how many women use public transport or access public places on their own after sundown. The International Film Festival of Kerala showcases avant-garde cinema, yet there’s a regressive honour in many men deeming it their ‘duty’ to protect women and restrict their world to the four walls of the house.
All these reflect a hypocrisy in society that Kerala is in denial about. Until the problem is acknowledged there can be little progress towards becoming an enlightened society.
The inflated egos and misplaced sense of morality must not come in the way of the academic goals of two students. Till then, let children be free to express their emotions without fake morality coming into the picture. Sometimes when telling the truth would lead to consequences in our lives, we usually resort to lies to save our skin. Though it is not at all desirable, the logic behind such a move may be valid.
Truth should always be the natural choice in our lives. This is important as it gives a unique feeling and clams our minds. It is the core values of our life. If we, however, think deeply, many times for our quick gain, we tell lies and then pretend that