A CALMER YOU

Sorry if this disappoints you right at the outset, but it’s not gonna work if you plan to show this column to your spouse, saying, ‘Ab toh newspaper mein bhi aa gaya…shaadi is nothing short of barbaadi.’ Because I have better things to say today than state the obvious. And the things that I want to say aren’t for those who already took the plunge and are reeling under the always-known-but-stillignored-isliye-ab-bhugto side effects.

They are meant for those who are standing at that stage in their lives when matrimony seems like an imminent and clear danger in the near future. Ghar mein shaadi ki baatein ho rahi hain — mom is busy checking out saris, dad the fixed deposits, and close rishtedaars thinking how to wriggle out of gifting a gold chain to the bride, considering the back-breaking inflation. And in the middle of all the preparations, the to-be bride or groom are suddenly spending more time in the loo.

No, you dirty people with dirty minds, it’s only because now is the moment in their life to stand in front of the mirror and ask themselves the much dreaded question, ‘Have I made it large?’ Oops, I mean, ‘Am I ready for marriage yet?’ If maturity levels are an indication, a lot of them probably aren’t... but then in all likelihood, they’ll never be,

Ironical as it may sound, I’m advising you to not seek too much advice from just about anyone on something as important, and personal, as getting married. It’s basic human nature, actually, to blurt out thoughts about something that’s causing constant confusion in your mind. But do realise that those around you would not have anything better to offer than vague or obvious suggestions like ‘Give it a serious thought’, whatever that means. If you feel like it, talk to some happy couples for inspiration.

But when it comes to making a decision, the only person who can help you is Know your stress: Be clear when it comes to the distinction between the stress