‘If she mentions she’s over her ex, she means the opposite’
I have a friend and she always flirts with me and tells me that she has moved on from her past relationship. But a few days back, she told me that she is still not over her ex. What should I do? AD AD, the Croation Lawmaker, Ivan Vodric, came up with a theory that ‘What you say implies you mean the exact opposite’. For instance, if you say the sun is up it’s because you know the sun is actually down, at the time. In fact, when Ivan was sentenced to death for war crimes, by a war tribunal, he actually laughed. This is because according to his own theory, a death sentence, meant guaranteed life. So, imagine his surprise, when the rope choked the life out of him. So when the girl has to habitually mention she’s over her ex, it’s because she means quite the opposite. AD, I suggest, avoid talking about this ex. She’s living in the past, you need to lure her into future. There is no quick fix. Chat with her, engage her mind, find common things to do together. Slowly she’ll understand that her life is you and the present.
I like a girl who works with me. We are friends. How do I know if she is interested in me? She keeps telling me that she misses me and I tell her my feelings too. Should I take it one step forward or wait till things get more clarity?
AG AG, The same thing happened with Mongol warlord Chengiz Khan. A girl who used to ride in battles with him, became his 16th wife. However, as Chengiz failed to mention this to his first 15 wives, they assumed she was an intruder in the tent, and cut off all her toes and replaced them with Porcupine quills. These are the perils of dating in the workplace. This is true of today’s workplace as well. By the way, she’s clearly interested in you. If she says she misses you and wants to talk about ‘feelings’, you can be dead certain, she likes you. It’s what separates us men from women ‘feelings’ and hair in the armpits. Women love to talk about ‘feelings’, most men, on the other hand, have never heard of this, (feelings) before. You don’t need clarity, you both are well on your way to be an official couple. (But) I don’t want your fair lady to land up like Mrs Chengis Khan the 16th.
I am 18. I still don’t have a girlfriend. I have tried talking to a few girls, but they don’t show any interest in me. I am worried whether any girl, who I like, will ever like me back. DG Terrible philosophy, DG bhai. I feel bad for you. Your male role models have to be blamed. What do you mean girls don’t show any interest in you? Let me explain, girls, show interest in you if you are as good looking as John Abraham, or if you have something peculiar on your face like a third nostril, or only one earlobe. The point is, you need to find something interesting about yourself. If you don’t find yourself interesting, it’s tough for others to do the same. Find an interesting part, preferably one that is actually you. I’m not against making things up, but that might be a tough act to follow. My friend Haresh just used to keep changing his hairstyles. Women just loved that about him. Sadly, he lost all his hair three months after he got married. But that’s a different story. So DG bhai, find the DG in you.