Apologise to relieve the burden

My husband doesn’t allow me to stay in touch with my family members. This is really unacceptable to me. What can I do?

Smitha R, New Delhi

It is really upsetting to know about your situation. I don’t understand how can he be so selfish. Please be firm and don’t allow him to do this to your family and you. He should be communicated clearly by you and other senior members of the family. This is not acceptable at any cost. Stay strong and fight this out.

My girlfriend has too many guy friends. I feel insecured. I want her to be only mine.

Daniel, New Delhi

Please don’t be over possessive. The long term results of insecurity and jealousy are often bitter. Love her as much as you can and I’m sure it would be reciprocated well. She is perhaps a friendly girl and if you love her truly then you should accept her the way she is. Trust her and let her be herself.

I come from a poor family. I’m 20 years old and my father is arranging my marriage with an affluent man who is divorced with a child. Please help.

Name unknown

You are an adult. If your father’s choice isn’t your preference, please protest in whatever way possible. He cannot force you to marry someone. Have a conversation with him. Involve other members of the family who might help convey the message. Do whatever it takes but don’t get married unless you are ready.

I had stolen my mother’s gold chain when I was in school. It’s been a decade and I feel terribly guilty every day.

J. P, Noida Feeling guilty today will not change anything. You can save money to buy your mother a similar gold chain. When you gift it to her, tell her the truth. Apologise and let go of the burden forever. Do it as soon as you can. Cheer up.

My father is having an affair with a lady who is much younger than him. I lost my mother when I was a child. How do I stop him? Please guide.

Tarun De, West Bengal

Why do you need to stop him? As a father he must be fulfilling his duty towards you. Then as a man, why can’t he have a life of his own? Try and stay focused on yourself. If you are feeling uneasy, you can always choose to relocate yourself for higher studies/ job. Have a happy life and let him have his own.

Feeling guilty in the present for a deed done long back in the past will not change anything. One must apologise and let go of the burden forever to have a peaceful life ahead. And it must be done as soon as possible.