Sex in Mar­riage

Sex is a lot more than just sharing your body—it’s a jour­ney of in­ti­macy- Dr. Juli Slat­tery

Maxx-brides - - JUST THE TWO OF US - Text by Me­lani Se­muel

The one thing you inim­itably share with your spouse that you don’t share with any­one else is SEX. So sex is the only thing that sets you and your spouse apart from sim­ply be­ing room­mates. It’s a vi­tal part of mar­riage. Some peo­ple and be­liefs think that sex is only for re­pro­duc­tion (that’s wrong). Oth­ers be­lieve that Sex has a higher pur­pose. The ul­ti­mate join­ing to­gether of a man and woman--the join­ing to­gether of two spir­its; the join­ing to­gether of two minds; and the join­ing to­gether of two bodies. That is why many peo­ple be­lieve in Moral Pu­rity. Moral pu­rity means that sex­ual ex­pres­sion is re­served for the covenant of mar­riage be­tween a hus­band and wife. Re­serv­ing sex, sex­ual fan­tasies, and sex­ual ex­pres­sion only for your hus­band or wife means more than just what you do phys­i­cally, but what you look at and what you think about. Sex is a lot more than just sharing your body—it’s a jour­ney of in­ti­macy. Fig­ur­ing out bound­aries to­gether gives you great op­por­tu­ni­ties to seek the Lord’s wis­dom, and to learn how to love each other more deeply. Gen 2:24 -That’s why a man shall leave his fa­ther and mother and is united with his wife, and they be­come one flesh. When you are mar­ried do not starve your spouse of Sex. The Bible says that mar­riage part­ners should of­fer their bodies to each other in mar­riage and should not deny each other ex­cept for a short sea­son for fast­ing (1 Corinthi­ans 7:5). God made men and women sex­ual be­ings. He made our ner­vous sys­tems ca­pa­ble of re­ceiv­ing plea­sure from the sex act. Sex in mar­riage is good and holy and or­dained of God. En­joy hav­ing sex with your part­ner, Mar­riage is the one place you can ex­plore and try new things. Don’t get bor­ing with the “vanilla” sex (aka, the mis­sion­ary po­si­tion). God is not against other po­si­tions and no one will judge you ex­plor­ing with your part­ner. That said, not ev­ery cou­ple en­joy the same things, fig­ure out what works for the both of you. You should en­joy it to the fullest. It is bet­ter to give than to re­ceive. When it comes to sex, it is bet­ter to give your­self will­fully to please your part­ner than wait to be pleased, most of the times. What’s more en­joy­able is get­ting your part­ner off, and be­ing re­as­sured that it was an en­joy­able ex­pe­ri­ence for him/ her. Some­times women want it. Try to send sig­nals to their man but don’t go for it be­cause of what so­ci­ety has made us be­lieve that it is the man’s place to ini­ti­ate sex­ual en­coun­ters. They want to re­ceive the plea­sur­able at­ten­tion, they wait for their hus­band to make the first move but it shouldn’t al­ways be like that. Send­ing sig­nals are great but some­times be­cause of the hec­tic de­mands of the day, your sig­nal may not be read. Mak­ing the first move doesn’t have to be you lit­er­ally ask­ing “let’s go have sex”, you should start off with games, sexy mes­sages while you’re at work, a ro­man­tic din­ner, a can­dlelit mas­sage with sen­sual oils - all of this will cre­ate a buildup that can lead to the most in­cred­i­ble of ex­pe­ri­ences. Be­ing on the re­ceiv­ing end is also a won­der­ful ex­pe­ri­ence, but to truly en­joy it you have to be very com­fort­able with your part­ner, you need to tell your part­ner where you like to be touched, and make re­quests for the things you imag­ine. To do this, you both need to be at a com­fort level with each other. Such that you’ve never ex­pe­ri­enced be­fore. It re­quires you to both be­come very vul­ner­a­ble by ask­ing, re­ceiv­ing and giv­ing sex­u­ally and it re­quires you to reach a deeper level of trust that your spouse will re­spond to your re­quests with­out judg­ment.

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