THE NIGHT HE LAUGHED
I was awakened in the middle of the night by an unfamiliar sound. I looked around the room. My wife was still sound asleep, her steady breathing reassuring me that everything was fine.
But just as I was drifting back to sleep, I heard it again.
“Hahaha… Haha.”
Careful to not disturb my wife, I slipped out of bed and looked at baby Martin in his crib. He was sleeping but smiling.
“Bwahaha.” Another bubble of joy burst from his tiny lips. This time, it woke up my wife as well.
“What’s happening?” She rubbed her eyes.
“I don’t know, but Martin seems to be having a good time.”
Martin hardly ever had a good time! From the day he was born, his life had been one of suffering.
He and his twin brother were born prematurely, at seven months. His brother was healthy, but Martin had a heart defect.
Martin was only six weeks old when he went into surgery.
Afterwards, the doctor smiled and gave us a thumbs up. “All went well. Your little guy’s a fighter.”
But all didn’t go well. While his brother grew into a healthy, chirpy baby, Martin grew steadily weaker, until he was so weak that even the slightest draft would turn into a cold. Inevitably, the cold would become pneumonia, and we would be back in the world of tubes, doctors, and stress.
When Martin would look at me with his big, serious eyes, I could sense his unique softness. But happy? No, that wouldn’t be the right word to describe him. He hardly ever smiled, but who could blame him? How do you comfort a baby that doesn’t understand why he’s suffering, or even that his life could be any different?
As his parents, we prayed fervently for him daily. Dear God, please heal him. Please make him better.
One night, a week before his first birthday, my wife prayed a different prayer. The constant trips to the hospital, the pain permanently etched on Martin’s face, and the relentless fear were getting to be too much.
“Dear God,” she prayed while we knelt by his crib, “I put Martin into Your hands. If You want to take him to You, I will accept that. But whatever happens, don’t let him suffer any more.”
That was the night that Martin laughed.
At one point, he roared with laughter, shaking his little fists in the air in excitement. For nearly an hour, he chuckled and chortled, as we watched with tears in our eyes.
The next day while he was nursing, he suddenly turned pale. “Something’s wrong!” my wife cried, and I raced over, just in time to witness Martin’s last moments in this world.
My wife and I looked at each other. Even though we felt deep sadness, a beautiful peace also surrounded us.
We knew that Martin was home.
MARK’S GOSPEL TELLS US ABOUT A PARALYZED MAN WHO JESUS HEALED.
Jesus was teaching in a room so crowded that the man’s friends had to make a hole in the roof and lower him down on his bed. But then, Jesus’ first words to him were, “Your sins are forgiven.”
Some in the crowd were astonished that Jesus declared that He could forgive sins, so He followed that up with: “So that you know I have the power to forgive sins, take up your bed and walk.”
Of course, the man did just that. But have you ever wondered why the first thing Jesus gave him was forgiveness? Wasn’t his most obvious need healing? Maybe to you and me, who put such weight in how we are faring in this life, and perhaps even to the paralyzed man that day. But Christ, who sees all eternity, knew that he needed forgiveness most.
I read this story again a few days after receiving the news of someone’s death. Another family without a parent. More hurting. And my heart asked, Jesus, why don’t You heal us now? How can You allow us to be so broken? I think I will feel that a little bit every time I hear sad news, and that’s okay. But catching this line in the story got me thinking that maybe I have things the wrong way around.
I really want to be okay now. And I want all the people to be okay. I want healing, provision, peace, safety, joy, and all the things that make life okay. But Jesus already made it okay when He offered forgiveness for sins, just like He offered the lame man healing for his spirit even before healing for his body.
This year, there has been so much loss in my little world that it’s forced me to think more along these lines. Is my hope really in heaven, or do I have my stock in this life? Jesus warned that even His followers would continue to have trouble in this world, and we are going to continue to run into loss, death, and suffering. But He followed that up with the promise that He had overcome, and that He would help them—and us—do the same.
That’s how we can be of good cheer.
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”—Jesus, John 16:33 NIV