Cuddle parties provide a safe space for hugs
SOMETIMES there’s nothing else for it but a nice hug. But what if there’s nobody in reach? Or your friends and family aren’t ‘ huggers’ and you’re too shy to correct that.
Rathdrum resident Randy Ralston runs a monthly ‘cuddle party’ in Bray and the event has been gathering steam amongst those who crave human touch.
Before we proceed, let’s make it very clear – there is nothing sexual about these gatherings. The innocence of the hug or the cuddle is preserved within the walls of Bray’s Beverly Studios on Church Terrace.
‘The Irish Cuddle Salon is in its fourth year,’ said Randy. ‘I began running these monthly cuddle events in early 2015. Initially they were held for a few months in Greystones, but we soon found our “home” at Common Ground in Bray and have been regulars there ever since. I also host cuddle parties elsewhere if there is a demand and also privately (for schools, businesses, other groups, etc.) on request.’
He said that there has been a steady interest in the cuddle parties since they started.
‘People who have never attended are understandably sceptical, and it is only those people who make the cheeky “nudge-nudge, wink-wink” jokes. Everyone who has actually participated knows it is nothing like that at all.
‘It is completely non-sexual, safe, boundaried and hosted by professionally trained and certified facilitators at all times,’ said Randy. ‘Some people come once or twice and never come back. Some people come intermittently, when they feel the desire and time permits, we might see them every few months or a couple of times a year.’
Still others are regular cuddle monsters and attend as often as possible, even bringing along their romantic partners because they just enjoy sharing human touch.
‘ There are some who have attended dozens of times,’ said Randy. ‘ There’s actually a bit of a community now built around conscious, consensual, welcomed touch and cuddles. It’s great.’
The phenomenon started in America and cuddle parties have been in existence for something like 14 years. Randy had heard about them, and the concept always interested him.
‘It wasn’t until I became a somatic sex educator that I began to realise there were many people in that field also involved with the cuddle party,’ he said. ‘When I looked more deeply into it, I saw a harmony between what they were doing and what I was doing. I felt it would be a good, fun, easy, accessible way for people to begin or continue their journey of (re)connecting with themselves, their bodies, and each other without having to equate “touch” with “sex”. I then got involved with the Cuddle Party organisation, which provides courses and a path to certification, and became a certified facilitator in 2015.’
Organisers say that the cuddle events are about experience, intimacy, and learning, especially for those who are touch-deprived. Attending a cuddle event can be a powerful healing session. There will be light exercise, boundary-practice and heart-warming exercises as part of the cuddle party.
Tickets for the Bray cuddle parties are sold on eventbrite.ie.