BREAKS-UP & BUST-UPS
With so many celebrities parting ways in 2017, our belief in the ability of true love to trump all lies in tatters.
We look at those for whom it all went a bit Pete Tong in 2017.
Breaking up is hard to do. Unless you’re a super soaraway celebrity – in which case, an unstable personal life is apparently part of the job description.
Still, all of us like to believe in the rose-hued “Hollywood endings” – so it’s a shock when apparently decent and perfectly-matched individuals announce they are calling it quits. Such was the case with golden couple Anna Faris and Chris Pratt who, in August, went public with the bombshell they were separating after six years of marriage.
“We tried hard for a long time, and we’re really disappointed,” said the couple, who have a four year-old child, Jack “We still have love for each other, will always cherish our time together and continue to have the deepest respect for one another.”
Also getting us right here – pulls open shirt to reveal space just over heart
– was the end of the romance between screen vampire Robert Pattinson and pop eccentric FKA Twigs. This was a shock as Pattinson had revealed to Howard Stern and he and the idiosyncratic Twigs were “kind of” engaged. Within two months, though, it was all off (it’s okay to cry).
“Rob is tired of it, has called off their engagement and told friends they have split,” a chum allegedly confessed to a UK tabloid. “With so much history between them, though, there are still strong feelings there.”
Bust-ups were also depressingly commonplace. Justin Bieber and Marilyn Manson were hard at it, having fallen out over t-shirt rights (never mess with a megastars merchandising). To quite the dark lord of unadulterated noise (that’s Manson, just to be clear): ”He was [already] wearing the shirt that had his name on my shirt, and he said to me, ‘I made you relevant again.’ Bad mistake to say to me.”
Never one to back down from a feud Taylor Swift continued to not get along with Katy Perry (Perry returned fire, with her cryptic VMA speech seen as a dis in the direction of Tay Tay). Swift also had lots of ire in reserve for Kanye West, whom she rounded upon (again) on her new album.
Pop stars have, in general, had rough time of it romantically through the 12 months just past. Dixie Chick Natalie Maines filed for divorce from Adrian Pasdar in June – according to TMZ, the singer cited irreconcilable difference for the unravelling of the 17 year marriage.
Rather shorter – at just under a year and a half – was the matrimonial union of Paramore’s Hayley Williams and New Found Glory guitarist Chad Gilbert, who announced the end of their time together via the age-old medium of Instagram.
Joining them in break-up alley was Ben Stiller and wife of 17 years Christine Taylor and Lord of the Rings star Orlando Bloom and pop star Katy Perry. “Before rumours or falsifications get out of hand, we can confirm that Orlando and Katy are taking respectful, loving space at this time,” said the Bloom and Kerry PR teams in a bittersweet display of unity.
Scarlett Johansson is also officially single, with the end of her marriage of three years for French journalist husband Romain Dauriac, with whom she has three year old daughter, Rose.
Meanwhile in September, Laurence Fishburne and his Gina Torres parted ways.
“With heavy hearts, Laurence and I quietly separated and began the dissolution of our marriage in the early fall of last year,” said Torres in a statement. “There are no bad guys here. Only a love story with a different ending than either one of us had expected. Happily, however, our family remains intact and we will continue to raise our daughter together with love and joy and awe. As well as raise each other up with respect and love and the continued understanding that we’re in this together, if not side by side.”
Further evidence of the cruelty of life and the fact we’re all headed for the void was offered by the reveal that Louise and Jamie Redknapp were no longer together. ‘Louise told one of her closest friends she and Jamie had split. She mentioned how much time they had spent apart and that when she and Jamie had tried to spend time together, it hadn’t been good.” Noooooo….!