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Have you ever used a “whip” for sex­ual en­joy­ment and plea­sure? It is one of the most widely fetishised forms of BDSM.

Those in­ter­ested, but unini­ti­ated, in the realm of BDSM should seek out the Begin­ner’s Guide To Spank­ing (Uberkinky), which has gen­eral in­for­ma­tion on safety, warm-up tech­niques, po­si­tions, and af­ter­care. The gen­eral prac­tice is to start spank­ing lightly and then to in­crease the in­ten­sity grad­u­ally, lis­ten­ing care­fully al­ways to the re­sponses of your BDSM part­ner. The same prin­ci­ple ap­plies to the use of a whip.

There is a strong yin and yang el­e­ment BDSM ac­tiv­i­ties. There are also facets of psy­chodrama and role-play­ing, with many sub­mis­sives tak­ing plea­sure in the very act of aban­don­ing them­selves to the whims of their mis­tresses or mas­ters. It is im­por­tant, how­ever, that ‘safe words’ or sig­nals are worked out in ad­vance as to how far the spank­ing, or the use of the whip, should go, or how hard it should be. That comes down es­sen­tially to the pain thresh­old, or the kinky taste, of the sub­mis­sive part­ner. The el­e­ment of trust is hugely im­por­tant here, and should never be abused.

Spank­ing can be a highly sexy, erotic warmup for sex play. And in­deed, it can in­duce or­gasms. It builds trust, adds that el­e­ment of sur­ren­der and brings a naughty feel­ing of trans­gres­sive ex­cite­ment into your sex rou­tines.

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