SUPPORTING YOUNG PEOPLE
Of course, many young people are also experiencing post-pandemic anxiety. “I’ve seen an increase in children being referred with different types of anxiety in the past year,” says Dr Malie Coyne, clinical psychologist and author of Love In, Love Out (HarperCollins). “In a lot of cases, an underlying anxiety was already there, but it was exacerbated during lockdown.” Dr Coyne advises parents look out for symptoms, observing “thoughts – do they have doom and gloom thoughts, polarised or extreme forms of thinking; feelings – are they more anxious or worried, tense or panicky; behaviours – are they avoiding school or talking to friends, have they gone into themselves, have their behaviours impacted on social or academic functioning; and physical sensations – are they agitated, getting stomach aches, having panic attacks, finding it difficult to sleep?”
“The biggest mistake parents make is trying to hide their own anxiety from their children,” says Dr Barry. “Parents need to say to their kids, ‘Look, I’m feeling anxious about going back into social situations’ and then have a deep discussion about why that happens – that often, we have false perceptions of what other people think of us. I teach people about self-acceptance – that’s where you separate who you are from your actions. I hear this all the time: I am a failure. They believe that if they fail at a task, then they’re the failure. Real resilience is getting up and trying again, it’s trying to blow away this idea that somehow we should never make mistakes, that we should all be perfect. That’s not real life.”
If you’re concerned about a young person, contact your GP. Waiting lists for services are particularly lengthy at the moment, but help is available and early intervention is key. Organisations like Jigsaw (jigsaw.ie) provide information and mental health support by experienced volunteers both online and in person. And SpunOut.ie is a great resource where young people can learn more about how to look after their wellbeing. The summer break provides an opportunity to help young people reflect and regroup before returning to school. Spend time talking through whatever’s on their minds and get them connecting with others, so they can work on their social skills. Camps may be rare (and place numbers low), but there are great online options to keep them busy, and keep a lookout for local Foróige or youth groups.