He is dragging out the divorce proceedings

I am currently going through an unpleasant divorce. Throughout our 14-year marriage, my husband was emotionally, psychologically and sometimes physically abusive. I have a new job and am recovering slowly, but I am struggling with money. He refused mediation and has left me to sort out everything financially. I am living off an overdraft and credit card. I don’t have a close relationship with my sister or mother as they think that I am difficult. The money from the sale of our flat is with my solicitor, but I can’t get hold of any of it. We also have another small house on the market. I feel as though my solicitor is trying to make as much money out of me as possible. There have been two court dates, but they have been cancelled as my husband has not returned the paperwork. I feel utterly desperate. Do I split the money with my ex or continue with the court route? I have never been in such a terrible financial state. I just want to be divorced and get rid of this controlling man.

Sadly, your abusive husband is still trying to control you by holding up the court proceedings. It sounds as though your solicitor is dragging his or her feet, too. You could find another one, but you should also consider the total legal fees so far, as these will have to be paid if you go elsewhere. A lot will depend on how much is at stake financially. For instance, will the sale of your property be enough to cover legal costs, and leave you with enough to buy a new flat or provide an income? It might be possible to apply for interim maintenance which could help with your current situation. You should also try to settle out of court; it is usually better unless the divorce is very acrimonious. Talk to your solicitor again and explain how desperate the situation is. If you feel as though they aren’t doing their job properly, contact the Law Society of Ireland (lawsociety.ie, 01 672 4800). Meanwhile, get in touch with Citizens Information (citizensinformation.ie) for free or more affordable legal advice.