THIS DAY IS ALL ABOUT YOU!

My parents are 47 years married today. I didn’t plan an entire edition of the magazine dedicated to weddings because of that, but it was a nice feeling when I realised it would fall on the same day. I know if I asked them for their secret to a happy marriage, they wouldn’t have an answer for me. Because there is no answer. If there was, marriage would be easy. And as we all know, it’s far from that. Early last March, I qualified as an ethical celebrant – good timing, eh?! It’s something that had been on my mind for a while after seeing a wonderful celebrant at my cousin’s daughter’s wedding in Glasgow. He had the whole room enthralled and I loved the idea of being such a central part of such a happy occasion. People are often so keen to just get the ceremony ‘out of the way’ so the real party can begin but that’s the part of the day that should be the most special, the most personal. He made it both. I eventually inquired and did a course with the Irish Institute of Celebrants. I had a couple of weddings booked last year, both of which were postponed but I can’t help thinking that this year’s rescheduled ceremonies – when they eventually can go ahead – are going to be so, so special after the year we’ve had. Imagine the sheer joy of all your family and friends being in one room, with no social distancing, no masks, just utter happiness. I know, I know, I’ll stop now! But seriously, I think the past year has made us all rethink what’s important. While that applies to life in general, it is particularly poignant when it comes to weddings. If you look at pages 20-25 of today’s issue, we hear from seven couples who went ahead with smaller ceremonies. Every one of them makes the point that the day became so much more about them and their love, and made them forget about the trivial things or decisions that were out of their control. One of the first things that we learned on the celebrancy course was that the ceremony is all about what the couple wants – there is a framework but it’s totally flexible and can be tailored completely to suit the bride and groom. That sentiment now seems to have become the theme of the whole day – and that can’t be a bad thing. Of course, couples are distraught that all their familes and friends couldn’t be with them but they were there and in the end that’s all that really matters. Then, of course, there are couples who decided to wait, like our fabulous fashion editor Grace Cahill, whose wedding tale of woe you can read on page 29. Waiting until you can have something approaching the event you want is perfectly understandable too. Like marriage, weddings are incredibly personal and what works for one couple might not work for another. So whether you’re newly engaged, in limbo awaiting the lifting of restrictions or have already booked a 2022 party, when all this will hopefully be just a bad memory, remember that it’s your special day and your happiness is all that matters – a plan that would form the basis of a good marriage too, I think.