HOW DO I STAND UP TO MY BULLYING BOSS?

QI am a head of department at a secondary school and I’m feeling overwhelmed.

I’m in my late 40s and have taught at this school for years but a new headmaster has undermined my confidence. This past year has been so hard as I have had my children at home and also have to help my mother-in-law who can’t manage on her own. (My husband has a demanding full-time job.) But the new head is younger, male and quite sexist, with a wife who looks after him and their children. For some reason he seems to have taken against me. He finds fault with everything I do and piles responsibilities on me. In meetings, he puts me down. I am at the point of leaving but I used to love my job.

AYou have a great deal on your plate so no wonder you are overwhelmed. It sounds as though your boss might be guilty of workplace bullying, which could well be based in sexism. Or he may feel threatened by the fact that you are older (and perhaps more experienced) and by your popularity (you say in your longer letter that he is ruthless and not well liked). Bullies will sometimes back down if confronted, but he sounds quite intimidating and of course it could backfire. But you shouldn’t have to leave a job you love and he should not be allowed to bully you (and in fact this may cross the line into harassment, which is illegal). You need to go to your teaching union and ask for advice on how to tackle this. To reduce the pressure at home, could you and your husband afford carers to help with your mother-in-law?

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