‘WE’LL MISS YOU SO MUCH’ – A FATHER’S FAREWELL
THERE was no announcement or fanfare; Fr Frank Herron simply said, ‘I would ask you all to remain seated for the final song.’
Standing in the gallery at the back of Foxrock Church, where nobody could see him, feted Bray artist Hozier began to sing Work Song.
Olivia Burke was a big fan, you see. And Hozier happened to be home for just a few days, and was moved enough by the Berkeley tragedy to oblige.
There’s nothing sweeter than my baby, he sang, as Paul and Paula prepared to bury their only daughter, who was baptised here on December 5, 1993.
Her youth was reflected in the congregation; a sea of babyfaced men in improbable black suits and ties, and solemn women on the cusp of their 20s.
By the time Hozier’s voice rang out through the packed church, we had learned much about Olivia’s life and loves.
Her cousin Amanda Donohoe, whose sister Ashley also died in last week’s balcony collapse, helped to bring gifts representing her short life to the altar.
There was the Loreto College journal, to show how the 21-yearold had enjoyed her six years in the school across the road; a photo of Olivia cuddling her beloved King Charles Spaniel, Skipper; and a throw superimposed with dozens of family snapshots, which had been a 21st birthday gift.
In his homily, Fr Herron said God ‘is not a builder, an architect or an engineer. He leaves all that to us. He was there that night at the 21st birthday party. He was there as the young people gathered and as they enjoyed themselves. And he was there as the accident happened.’
WE were gathered to ‘celebrate Olivia’s life’ said her father Paul in his reflection. It was, he said, his third time standing before a congregation at a funeral Mass, but his father and mother had both been in their 80s when they died so those e ul ogies had been ‘ quite manageable’.
‘It is a challenge to stand here to stand here to talk about a child that has gone at such a tender age. Not being able to experience all of her potential – be it in her career, her friendship, her loves – that will cause us heartache in the times ahead,’ he said.
But Olivia ‘ packed a lot into her 21 years - travel, work experiences, friendship, education’.
She started school in Scoil Mhuire, Sandymount, ‘a very shy type’ and had flourished in confidence by the time she left.
‘Six great years’ in Loreto followed where she made ‘ some wonderful friendships’ before starting in IADT ‘just down the road’, studying for a degree in entrepreneurship and management. Olivia and friends travelled to Vancouver in the summer after first year. ‘Then it was Thailand and Vietnam after second year, which, needless to say, all parents dread, but they all came home safely,’ said Paul.
On May 24, after completing her third year in college, Olivia and her friends, including Eimear Walsh, who also died, and Aoife Beary, who was injured, travelled to the US on their J1 visas.
Since her death, Paul, his wife Paula and their son Gavin have been collecting stories about Olivia from those who knew her.
‘The comments have been pretty consistent; that she was a genuinely nice person, she was a caring and considerate person who would be more worried about your problems than chatting about her own. But she did chat,’ he emphasised, to laughter from the congregation.
He then spoke of her ‘steely determination to succeed’’, adding: ‘That work ethic was something I really admired.’
She had just one year left in her degree and ‘I know she would want to wish the rest of the students the best of luck in fourth year starting next September’.
Olivia’s childhood sounded idyllic, with summers spent by the sea in Blainroe estate, Co. Wicklow, where she and her friends would ‘ride around the countryside on bikes, play tennis and cause mischief. Blainroe had some f antastic summertime memories for Olivia,’ said Paul.
‘There is one special person I must mention and that’s Olivia’s cousin Ashl e y Donohoe. Although they were separated by 6000 miles they were incredibly close,’ he said. The girls first began to play together aged eighteen months and continued their friendship throughout their lives. Olivia was thrilled when Ashley turned up unannounced for her 18th birthday.
‘We will miss you so much Ashley. You two girls departed this world side by side, may you be together in God’s grace and look down on the rest of us.’
TO his daughter’s Loreto classmates he said: ‘It has been a pleasure knowing you girls in recent years. I’m sure Olivia and Eimear will smile down on you guys.’
Some 50 of these f riends formed a guard of honour when Olivia’s remains left the church in a silver casket while Amazing Grace was sung, before she was brought for burial to Deansgrange cemetery.
As they stood behind the hearse, Gavin put an consoling arm around his mother, gently rubbing her arm.
A Maple tree planted on the church grounds last Friday in honour of the Berkeley victims is now full of messages written on fluttering white ribbons. It is a poignant reminder of those young lives needlessly lost.