Southgate’s saving grace

FOR once, it’s not easy to have a tantalising expectation of an English football manager falling flat on his face. Gareth Southgate is spectacularly dull, and we have no great reason to wish, as soon as possible, for that eventual failure.

Chewing Southgate (below) up and spitting him out is also going to be a more difficult exercise for the English media, who regularly have had their teeth sharpeneed by the idiocy, and sheer voluptuousness of the big talk, coming out from the likes of Roy Hodgson and Sam Allardyce in recent times.

Southgate is the antithesis of the late Graham Taylor — Gareth is at pains to say the right thing during his press conferences, whereas Graham, God love him and mind him, feared doubling over with cramp if he didn’t get to say the wrong thing.

Terry Venables followed Taylor, then there was Glenn Hoddle, all deluded innocence. There was Keegan and Eriksson and poor, poor Steve McClaren. Fabio Capello gave everyone a breather, before the age of Roy and Sam.

England know how to get it wrong on the field in World Cup finals, but before they even commence, long before, they’ve also got it wrong in choosing managers who have been bigger and bolder than their own teams — and always moving but inviting targets for every journalist on the prowl.

It’s a shame about Southgate, especially for those who will have no fun whatsoever trying to put the knife in once his team gets rolled over.