Why should he walk free when my son will never come home?
WHEN my son Oli was killed in the September 11 attacks, my husband and I flew straight to the US.
It was a beautiful sunny day when we arrived in New York – and that bothered me. The fine weather jarred with our despair. It’s been like that ever since.
Every beautiful thing in life – even the arrival of a grandchild – is tainted. Life goes on, but it is never the same.
I regard it as a life sentence. There is no parole. No hope of early release. Even my name – Joy – conflicted with how I felt.
Last week, we discovered that Mounir el-Motassedeq, who acted as the ‘treasurer’ for the heartless terrorists who killed my 29-year-old son, has just been released from prison after being sentenced to 15 years.
It’s hard to put into words how it felt to look at how this man received a hero’s welcome in Marrakesh.
Shock
My first reaction was one of shock when I saw how young he was. I hadn’t realised that el-Motassedeq was only 27 when he became involved.
Here was a man who is now 44, a man with a life that can be rebuilt. I will never know what Oli would have looked like at the same age.
Of course we had known that this day was coming. At the time of el-Motassedeq’s trial in 2003, 15 years seemed a small punishment for someone who had spent time in an Al Qaeda training camp and directly organised the killers’ finances.
But at least somebody was being charged. The pilots who flew into the Twin Towers, where Oli was attending a conference on global finance, were dead, and there seemed little hope of anyone being brought to justice.
Naively, perhaps, we were just relieved that someone was being held to account. Though I still don’t know how the judges thought 15 years was enough. All I can say is that we, Oli’s family, got this life sentence, and are reminded of it every single day.
The parallels between this man’s future, and Oli’s lack thereof are painful.
This man’s children were thrilled to have him home. Oli never got the chance to have children. I am not a vengeful person, but it is hard to read about el-Motassedeq’s homecoming, when Oli will never come home.
My concerns aren’t just about our family’s loss and pain, though. El-Motassedeq is now a free man. Free to do what, though?
As reported last week, there seems to be a neglible amount of surveillance being carried out on him now. Who has responsibility for him? What moves have been made to address his radicalism?
While the Germans may be glad to see the back of him, no doubt it would have been safer if he had remained in Germany under strict surveillance.
I have found myself wondering what Oli would say about this situation. We could not have been prouder of our son and all he achieved.
He’d studied psychology and economics at the University of St Andrews in Scotland, and ended up moving to New York to write about complex financial markets.
More importantly, he’d turned into a wonderful young man – caring, warm-hearted, fun to be around. I have no doubt he would have done remarkable things.
We didn’t know immediately that he had been caught up in the attacks. I was in a shop when I saw the footage, and it wasn’t until I got home that the phones started ringing…
He would not have wanted a knee-jerk reaction when it comes to justice.
In the months immediately after 9/11, I was horrified by the response of the authorities.
I saw the then UK prime minister Tony Blair and told him never to say he was waging the Iraq war in my son’s name.
Slaughter
He wouldn’t have wanted anyone else – more innocent victims – to be killed. I like to think I have had a measured response to his death. I certainly don’t hate Muslims.
My anger is directed at the authorities who were aware of these sorts of extremists operating and failed to take robust action.
The true perpetrators have never been brought to justice.
And with el-Motassedeq being released, can we really know he has put an end to his life of terrorism?
I do not know what I would say if I were in the room with el-Motassedeq.
I suppose I would ask him what was he possibly hoping to gain by the slaughter of so many innocent people?
Maybe he will find himself sitting down and explaining himself and his actions to his own children now, leading a peaceful and productive life. I hope – for all our sakes – that whatever he is saying isn’t simply fuelling another generation with murderous hatred.
If it is, his relatively short prison sentence will be dangerous for us all.