B*Witched star opens up over miscarriage trauma
SINÉAD O’Carroll has opened up to her former B*Witched bandmates about her two heartbreaking miscarriages.
The singer, along with Edele Lynch, Keavy Lynch, and Lindsay Armaou, discussed the loss during the most recent episode of their podcast Starting Over with B*Witched.
Sinéad recalled that when she was in her early thirties she was ‘dying to start this next chapter’ of motherhood.
She revealed: ‘I probably would’ve wanted to years beforehand but it just didn’t happen
‘I thought my life was starting’
that way when you started the journey and realised this was taking a little bit longer than I thought it was going to be.
‘And you do all the right things and you try to get into the mindset: you’re eating the right foods and exercising.
‘I just remember doing the pregnancy test and it being positive and thinking: “Oh my god, my life is starting, this is fantastic”, and I told everybody.
‘At that time, I wasn’t going for early scans so I’m thinking I feel great, I feel wonderful.
‘And then I had booked to see my obstetrician for the 12 weeks scan, so I was 11 and a half weeks. I was so excited... you’re literally on a high with the idea you’re going to hear the heartbeat and see everything.
‘I remember being in there and getting a scan… but I just remember her saying: “There is no heartbeat”.
‘It’s a really weird out-of-body experience because you’ve totally made a relationship already. You’ve been talking to it; you’ve been looking at the books.
‘For me, I know it might sound strange, but I had submerged myself a few years into my emotional, spiritual healing, and my reiki, and my belief from all of that kicked in and I leaned into the thing, this is not the right time.
‘My body is getting ready, and I went to a really good place with it because I do tend to put everything on a different level. I felt at peace with that.’
It wasn’t until Sinéad had to go in for dilatation and curettage (D&C) – a post-miscarriage procedure – that things got worse.
‘I went into have the D&C a week and a half later. I felt that was more traumatic,’ she said.
‘I remember feeling the physical loss because, energetically, it was almost like it was part of me, but because I had this procedure it wasn’t there anymore. So that was really difficult.’
In between the later birth of her two children Samara and Zain, Sinéad suffered another miscarriage at about nine weeks.
‘I was so overwhelmed as a new mum. My body shook for four years because I was so overwhelmed. I had this thing that on paper at 16 months, you should start trying to have them close together, but I knew in my head I wasn’t ready.’
Sinéad has been very open and honest since launching the Starting Over podcast with her bandmates, having also opened up about a serious ‘financial blow’ she suffered after investing in a new Irish girl group.
After B*Witched were dropped from their label in 2002, Sinéad went on to become a manager in search of the next big Irish band before things went belly-up.
‘I remember the physical loss’