A magic number

No competition for this BMW beauty

HOW much do you think a car really costs? How much do you reckon the carmaker gets, and how much goes to the Exchequer? Well, let’s take a look at the Competition version of the BMW M3 saloon.

The base price when the car lands at the docks is €67,690.74 (and you’ve got to love BMW for being precise to the cent). My test car here came with optional extras, of which more later, that added €11,507.49, for a total of €79,198.23.

Now let’s add what the Government takes. For starters, there’s VAT of €18,215.59. Now apply the VRT, in this case a whopping €48,714.84. So, out of the total cost to the buyer, there’s €79,198.23 to be shared among BMW, its Irish import subsidiary, and the dealer who sells it. The Exchequer gets €66,930.43 all to itself.

An acquaintance who is greatly concerned by climate change told me this week that motor tax for cars such as this should be €20,000 a year, but that is how much tax it generates anyway. Let’s assume ownership of seven years — at €2,400 a year motor tax, that’s another €16,800.

Now let’s look at fuel. Of the current price of petrol at €1.44 a litre, the Exchequer takes 91.5 cent in excise duty, VAT and carbon tax. This car drinks an average 10.2 litres per 100km, so you’ll use €19,764 worth of petrol if you drive 20,000km a year for seven years. That means the Government gets another €12,558.83, for a total seven-year tax take of €96,289.25.

So, there you have it — this car will generate an average of almost 20 grand a year in tax, granting my friend his wish.

And do you know what? If I had the money, I couldn’t care less, because the M3 Competition is a monster, an absolute belter that has you heading towards penalty points territory in just four seconds. The speed is governed at 250kph, or 290kph if you choose the M Driver’s pack, but the speedometer goes to 330kph, the highest I personally every have seen on a road car.

What that means is that the M3 really is built for the autobahn. At around 600km, the drive from BMW’s home base in Munich to the German capital, Berlin, would take five hours at our speed limit, and just two hours and 24 minutes at the M3’s 250kph top speed.

Anyway, before this turns into a total maths lesson, let’s go back to the car. The front grille is divisive —what used to look like a pair of kidneys now appears to be a pair of lungs. I actually rather like it, because it lends the car a real air of aggression, especially set against this Isle Of Man Green body colour (which, incidentally, proved just as divisive!). The stance is excellent as well, amplified by the fact the front wheels are 19-inch black alloys while the rear are 20-inch.

Inside, the M Carbon bucket seats are terrific, though the cut-outs in them might prove annoying if you had a child in the back seat poking you as you drove.

More pertinently, they alone also add €5,870 to the overall price, with another seven grand going on the carbon detailing on the exterior, notably the roof.

But none of that matters compared to performance, and what a joy that is. The M3 is an untamed beast, an absolute cracker from the second you switch on the ignition. There’s a terrific roar when you floor it and a moment when time seems to stand still before everything kicks in and you feel like you’re in a glider launched with a bungee cord.

You have to keep an eye on the speedometer, though, because at 120kph, you feel like you’re doing half that, and the rev counter barely moves.

I’d love to be able to tell you I drove it much faster than that, but I can’t — I have limited public transport options and really do value my licence!

So, who would buy this car in Ireland? Well, someone who loves cars, for whom money is no object, and who doesn’t lie awake at night worrying about the future of the planet.

I don’t check those last two boxes, so it’s not my personal end of the market — but just for a week, I could park my penury and my concerns and sit back to enjoy this M3 Competition, a work of flawless beauty.