SCARS HAVE SET ME BACK
DEAR JENNIFER: Two years ago I was in a house fire. We all got out quickly, but I still got burnt when something fell on me as I left the building. It was probably a piece of falling material or curtain but it was enough to give me some nasty burns.
I’ve had a few operations, treatments and a skin graft in one area since then that have left me with a lot of scarring on the right-hand side of my face and my neck. Recovery has been a painful, slow process and it took me over a year to feel confident enough to start going out socially again.
However, it’s still far from easy. I’ve had people come up to my left side to talk to me, only to turn away when they see my right side. Other people just can’t seem to stop staring. One woman walked right up to me last week and just asked, ‘What happened to you dear?’, as if she had a right to know.
It’s upsetting every time it happens, and I usually have what little confidence I have built up being knocked out of me for a few days.
Sometimes I wonder if it would just be easier to hide myself away again.
Please don’t do that, as you’d only really be punishing yourself for other peoples’ shortcomings.
Attitudes and reactions to any form of disfigurement can sometimes be negative, unfortunately. But it’s important to realise that not everyone will be doing this maliciously, for the most part it’s unintentional.
Some many simply do a doubletake and carry on. Others may stare for too long without realising because they never have seen anything like it.
That said, some people can also be rude and intrusive.
You should consider talking with your GP about a referral for counselling support.