It ALL’ BoDEs VERY WELL

THere is this famous image of Sam Allardyce with his feet on the table, cigar in one hand, Third Division trophy in the other.

For sure, a picture doesn’t always tell a thousand words... sometimes you just need a dozen to know that not all superheroes have capes, some wear a look of smug self-satisfaction.

Catapulted into Elland Road, Fireman Sam has some serious firefighting to do over the next four games.

Leeds are in a mess, having won just one point from their last five games, conceding 18 goals in the process, 67 throughout the season, turning to Big Sam just as the words ‘watch out captain, there’s an Iceberg up ahead’ have been uttered by the lookout.

You can see why they’ve done so. Blackburn were 19th when they appointed Allardyce in December 2008. They ended up 15th and safe.

In October 2015, Sunderland were also in 19th spot when they raised the alarm. Big Sam answered it, steering them away from the Iceberg and into port, ending that year in 17th.

Next came Crystal Palace, 17th when he arrived in December 2016, 14th by end of term. After that Everton — 13th on the day he walked in the door, eighth by the time the year ended. Only West Brom, his last job, was a failure.

Difference

But there is a big difference between then and now. At all those clubs, Allardyce had time, a transfer window to get in players he wanted and just as importantly to sell those he didn’t.

Now he has four games to survive.

That’s a mere 360 minutes. The first 90 of those are at Manchester City, the next 90 against Newcastle.

So realistically he has just two matches, West Ham away, Spurs at home, to save his team and pocket the €3m bonus he has been promised for keeping Leeds up.

He’s the easiest person in the world to mock, Big Sam, when you consider his gigantic size ego and the fact he lasted just one game in the England job before being exposed by a sting operation and subsequently sacked by the FA.

That’s before we get to his turgid tactics and addiction to self-praise.

Yet, given the circumstances, Leeds are in a much better place now than they were 48 hours ago, when Javi Gracia was manning the ship.

But the problem isn’t that Allardyce has been sent for — it’s the fact they waited so long before doing so, going through three managers already this year, getting progressively worse as the season went on.

“If you are a fan of a Premier League club you would like to think there is some kind of plan when it comes to managers,” said Alan Pardew in an interview with The Times last weekend.

“But there isn’t really. The power used to rest with the manager. Now it is the owner.”

That’s all well and good until you figure out the type of owner you have.

Nature

And anyone staring at the scrap for survival at the bottom of the Premier League has a fair idea about the panicky nature of those in charge.

Eight of the teams in the bottom half have changed manager this season

— Southampton, Leeds and Chelsea more than once — but only Palace, Wolves and Bournemouth to any great effect.

The rest are in a mess, Everton in line for their first relegation since 1951, Southampton with less hope of surviving than Gloria Gaynor, Leicester looking better now with five points from three games than they appeared under Brendan Rodgers.

But then you look at the Foxes’ run-in: Fulham, Liverpool, Newcastle, West Ham.

First up is Fulham away, which may seem a winnable fixture given how the Cottagers have already lost six times at home this season.

But there is a distinct difference between Fulham’s home record against top-half and lower-half teams. Chelsea, Forest, Southampton and Leeds all lost there; Everton, Wolves managed draws. Of the bottom 10, only West Ham got a win at Craven Cottage, three points which will go a long way to keeping the Hammers safe. That leaves five teams — Leicester, Leeds, Forest, Everton and

Southampton in the mire.

You can write off Southampton because a sixpoint gap to safety, at a time in the season when there are only 12 to play for, is a massive total.

Then there’s Everton, who some fans feel have got what they deserved after going through a chaotic period of managerial change across the last decade, seeing two coaches who have managed internationally and a further two who have taken charge of Champions League-winning sides all leave Goodison Park.

Along the way, there has been neither rhyme nor reason to their planning.

Looking

One minute they are looking for old-school British managers — David Moyes, Allardyce, Frank Lampard and incumbent Sean Dyche — and the next they are shopping abroad, to Spain’s Roberto Martinez and Rafa Benitez, Portugal’s Marco Silva, Italy’s Carlo Ancelotti, Dutchman Ronald Koeman.

That’s nine permanent managers in 10 years — all leaving their own ideas and signings for incumbent Dyche to try and mould into a cohesive unit.

Too good to go down?

Not when you look at their recent history — the five times in the last quarter of a century when they have finished 15th or lower in the table.

It has been a long time since they won anything — 28 years — and even longer since they were the country’s best side, 36 years.

You get what you deserve in football and the club hierarchy have been revealed as inadequate planners, panicky decision makers and poor spenders.

Watch them,

Leicester battle

Leeds to stay up.

Forest and it out with

Advantage

And while the Foxes’ goal difference gives them a noticeable advantage, Forest’s favourable run-in is likelier to be an even bigger deal.

They have Southampton and Chelsea to come — as well as a final-day trip to Palace, who will be safe by then.

Plus they have the assurance of a manager who has been there since day one of the season, who has signed this squad, who believes and trusts in them.

That’ll count at this time of the season.

As will experience.

And in Big Sam, master of 16 survivals from 17 Premier League seasons, they may have the biggest ego in the football world but they also have someone who knows where the lifeboats are stored.

You can picture him saying ‘women, children … and Leeds United players this way, please’ knowing they’ll be around the Premier League next season, as will Forest.

As for Toffees, Foxes and Saints fans, it is time to start searching for the route to Plymouth and Ipswich in Google maps.