Girlfriend thinks I fancy my eight cousins

SIOBHAN SAYS: Many firms frown upon work-based relationships.

Protect your salary and reputation by telling your colleague you are happy to remain friends, but no more than that.

If he continues to pester you then you might have to report this to your HR department.

This is still not the climate in which to take risks with your general or sexual health.

The number of cases of syphilis have doubled in the Dublin area recently and there is always COVID-19 to think about.

She swears she loves me and is committed to our relationship, but she wants to feel free to see other guys too.

She argues we need to “keep things fresh”. Do we? Things feel pretty fresh to me right now.

We’ve moved into a good house in a decent village. We’ve made loads of new friends and I’m just about to start my own business.

But she brands me “unreasonable” for complaining about her regular chats and meet-ups with her army of adoring men.

She’s a very vivacious, popular woman. She has a host of male

MY GIRL is horribly jealous of my family and I’m worried it’s going to ruin our relationship.

I’m an only child. I grew up with eight female cousins, all of whom I’m still extremely close to.

My partner doesn’t like this – she views my cousins as a threat and often mutters things like: “Cousins can marry, you know.”

I’m not the slightest bit interested in my relations in a romantic way but recently, at a family party, she kicked off.

Banned

admirers including ex-lovers and new chancers she’s met online.

I’m no caveman, but I’m really not interested in an open relationship.

I’m not attracted to other women because I have committed to this life and I’m done with playing the field.

She accused me of ignoring her in favour of them.

She caused so much of a scene that now an aunt and my parents have

Wild

Don’t get me wrong — I was pretty wild in my day, but I no longer crave excitement. I just want a simple existence. Is that too much to ask for?

The other night she didn’t come home until 3am. She swore that she wasn’t with another lover even though her make-up was smeared and she smelt of Lynx Africa.

We had a vicious row, during which she said I was boring and controlling banned her from future gatherings.

She says she’s sorry, but is she going to improve?

SIOBHAN SAYS: It could be your partner has low self-esteem and feels intimidated by your close family.

If you’re absolutely sure you don’t ignore her in favour of them and aren’t rude, then you have to decide how much you’re willing to put up with.

If she would prefer you never saw your family would that put her in the “control freak” category?

And how could you possibly cope with that, coming from such a close family.

Your folks know and love you. If

Sadly,ifshecravesanopenrelationship and that’s not an option for you, then you and her need to talk.

A relationship isn’t just about the nice house and friendly new neighbours,it’saboutanemotional connection, trust and similar goals.

Idyll

Clearly, you and she are at very differentpointsinyourlives.You’re ready to settle down, while she still wants to play. She might never be interested in the suburban idyll.

Break the silence by insisting on a grown-up conversation. Make it clear you’re not interested in fighting.

If she’s missing the single life and really needs to see other men, then set her free. they fear she’s a bad influence, maybe a period of space and reflection is required?

Really think about what her attitude will mean in future if you continue with your relationship.

Consider how things would be if you had children and she chose to use them as pawns in this battle. Is she really the right one for you?