Five months after surgery I am well and the indicators tell me I’m cancer free
Aloyal reader made contact recently to find out how I have been doing since I had surgery for prostate cancer. He has his own difficulties in that area and over the last few months every time he bought the paper he anticipated an update from me.
I was reluctant to put pen to paper and address the topic again as I didn’t want to be ‘going on about it.’
I am reminded of the story of two heifers who decided to leave their female herd in search of male company.
Under the cover of darkness they jumped the ditch and made their way to a farm where the gender mix was somewhat more exiting.
They mingled quietly with their new found friends and the following morning met at a pre-arranged spot to amble back to their own patch.
Comparing notes about their romantic night out it emerged that one of them had met a marvellous bull. She described an encounter that would leave ‘Normal People’ looking like an episode of ‘Little House on the Prairie’. Her companion, unfortunately, had a most boring time as her date turned out to be a bullock who spent the whole night talking about his operation.
I fear I could fall into the latter category if I’m not careful.
Anyway, I had the surgery, it involved a general anaesthetic and a few hours on the operating table.
When it was over the surgeon appeared to me through my soporific haze in the recovery room to assure me that things had gone very well. The following morning I was instructed to get up and get dressed, which I duly did, and spent the day wandering around the hospital chatting and eating whatever was put in front of me.
As far as I was concerned I had made a miraculous recovery. However, I paid for my ebullience the following day when I felt really ill.
As a result of overdoing it I had to spend an extra 24 hours in hospital. When I got home I overdid it again and ended up at Shannon Doc where an excellent young doctor settled me and told me to take food and exercise in bite sizes.
Easy does it:
It was the first lesson for me – after surgery, eat sparingly and be gentle with the body. The mind might want to power ahead, the ego might want you to prove to the world that Superman dwells in your chest, but the body, having been invaded by a robot, wants rest and recuperation.
From then on I listened to my body and took everything at a snail’s pace. As part of the post -operative treatment I had to wear a catheter for two weeks, an experience that isn’t at all as unpleasant as it sounds.
In fact, the mind and the body are amazingly adaptable and can acclimatise themselves to most situations. If someone had described to me in detail what was ahead, I would have baulked at the prospect, but once you are there you get on with it.
My convalescence coincided with the early days of the Covid crisis. In fact, the day I went to have the
An early lesson was to eat sparingly and be gentle with the body. After being invaded by a robot, the body wants rest and recuperation. catheter removed was the day Leo Varadkar stood outside the Irish Embassy in Washington and told the nation to go home and stay there. It felt like everyone was in convalescent mode and I wasn’t the only one in a dressing gown and slippers.
Getting back to normal was accomplished in stages. One of the first jobs I had to do was to potty train myself all over again. You’ll be glad to know it’s much easier the second time round and accidents are few and far between.
Pelvic exercises
The staff at the physio department in the Galway Clinic were a fantastic support by phone and on video as they helped me, with a regime of pelvic floor exercises, rebuild my strength in places where the sun doesn’t shine.
In my first post-op consultation the trusty surgeon revealed that the cancer was more aggressive than he had originally thought. My prostate was more than double the size of a normally enlarged prostate. I was feeling positively Trumpian in my exceptionalism. Perhaps I should get a t-shirt made to celebrate it.
Five months down the line, the indicators tell me I’m cancer-free and, aside from a series of kidney infections, I feel fine. I walk for an hour a day and while I’m eating well I’ve cut back on my intake of caffeine and alcohol – these are not good friends to the waterworks.
On another note, I won’t be the subject of a paternity suit anytime soon, and on nights out I’ll be the one talking about my operation.