Religious relatives hijack the wedding

something as solemn as a nuptial mass. I have been to several and, even though I was brought up Catholic, I found them very long and serious, though absolutely beautiful.

Bottom line, it is up to your daughter and her fiancé what they decide. But you should tell them of the consequences – that perhaps some of her family may just go to the reception.

You will have to go along with what she chooses. Honestly, though it might feel foreign to you, witnessing her wed at a nuptial mass could be a wonderful experience. At a time when many are criticised for taking marriage too lightly, you will probably be impressed by the solemnity of the occasion and the reverence it shows towards what many still call a sacrament.

Look, some brides and grooms throw themselves out of aeroplanes or get married in hot air balloons over the Kalahari Desert. Your daughter, if this is what she ultimately decides, is following an altogether more traditional and old-fashioned route.

And, of course, the religious part of it is clearly very, very important to the groom’s parents. The nuptial mass may be a non-negotiable part of their religious belief. Just be enthusiastic and don’t turn the ceremony into a battleground. It’s not worth it – it’s only an hour or so long!

Seeing your daughter marry at a nuptial mass could be a wonderful experience