PIPER’S GOT STRICTLY MOJO AT MAGIC 20/1

Willy’s gone right moody

STRICTLY Come Dancing has returned to remind us that we’re another year closer to the grave’s embrace. And what a series it promises to be! The bloke possibly from a hospital thing is in it. And there’s one of the girls from S Club 7, except it wasn’t them. And a Youtube, who you might describe as a bit of a ‘Marmite personality’, if Marmite makes you feel tired and irritable.

If she finished last night’s opener in good order, I fancy inspirational Katie Piper (below) at 20/1 (Unibet) to ‘go on a journey’ with the nation’s fiver tucked in her spanx.

She’s got the vibe and will hoof like a good ‘un if I’m any judge.

Then again, I thought the foxtrots were something you got from eating roadkill. Small stakes. TRUST streaky Willian to bring home the bacon for Chelsea at West Ham.

The brilliant Brazilian seems to be entering another of his phases of fizzing form. He’s unplayable in the right mood, and with Eden Hazard back to wave him through with his wand, it looks grim for injury-hit West Ham (1.30pm).

Split a stake and back Willian (left) ‘anytime scorer’ at the general 2/1 and ‘first scorer’ at 7/1 (Boylesport).