Mary Black
The legendary Irish singer chats to Darragh MacManus about music and family
Family is entwined in Mary Black’s illustrious music career. Her sister Frances is a renowned singer in her own right. The two, along with brothers Shay, Michael and Martin, comprise The Black Family, a group described as “one of the most important musical clans in Ireland.”
Two of Mary’s children, Danny O’Reilly and Róisín Ó, are busy carving out their own musical paths, as is Frances’ daughter Aoife Scott. The three cousins performed a spine-tingling version of Grace during RTÉ’s Centenary concert in 2016; of which Mary says she was “hugely proud.”
Now she’s talking about a different, but equally important, family relationship: the one with her grandchildren. Six-year-old Bonnie and four-year-old Fía – daughters of Conor, Mary’s eldest – cheerfully agreed to join her for the launch of Specsavers’ Grandparent of the Year award, which honours “Ireland’s most exceptional grandparent” and “celebrates the extraordinary contribution they make to the lives of grandchildren and the community.”
“They call me Mamó,” she says, “the Irish word for grandmother. They’re at that lovely age. I just adore them, they’re amazing. You don’t know how great it is being a grandparent until you experience it. Your heart lifts and you can’t help having a smile on your face when you see them. And,” she laughs, “you can hand them back at the end of the day!”
The girls live “just around the corner” from Mary, which, apart from being convenient, is a nice reminder of her own mother, who also lived nearby when she was raising Conor, Róisín and Danny. As a bestselling artist, in demand around the world, Mary was often touring – and recalls the huge support her mother gave at the time.
“I think about not only how much I benefited from it,” she says, “but how she benefited too, and my kids as well. They still talk about her, years later. They had a great relationship with her.
“She was hands-on, she was funny and played with them, which she didn’t do as much with us. There were five of us, she was very busy, trying to make ends meet. Life was tough with five small kids, so it was great to see that side of her.”
Too often, children miss out on a close relationship with their grandparents, which is a real pity, Mary believes: “It’s a whole different vibe, and so interesting to see your parents interacting with the generation below you. We kind of get child-like ourselves with grandchildren. I get down on my knees and play with them, and do things I probably didn’t do a lot with my kids.
“And you can indulge your grandkids, whereas with your own you kind of feel you have to be the drill-sergeant at times. I was asked lately was I soft with them – absolutely I am!”
She’s determined to be hands-on, as her mother was, so has “made more time” in her life for her grandchildren. Mary adds, “I want to have the relationship my mother had with my kids. I saw how much it meant to everyone, and make sure I see lots of the girls: they stay overnight and I take them on holidays. We go to Kerry or Spain during the summer. It’s brilliant, a new lease of life.”
This isn’t the only change in Mary Black’s life: while she hasn’t exactly given up on touring, she has cut back a lot of travel abroad. “I wanted to wind down,” she explains. “As time goes by, you realise how precious it is. I want to make time for other things at this stage. I pick and choose the nice things! But not the hard work of flights and travelling, a different city every night. It takes too much out of you, and I’m doing it nearly 40 years. I don’t need to any more.
“By doing a one-off gig somewhere, you get to see the place in a way you wouldn’t on a longer tour. I’m just about to leave for a festival in Australia, and we’re stopping in Hong Kong for a few days on the way, and then staying for a week to see some of Australia.
“I’ve been going there for 25 years, but you only see certain things and meet certain people. You don’t really get time off the road: a day in a city here and there, and that’s about it. You’re tired and you don’t feel like going on a city tour or something. But now I can travel on my own terms. The gig pays for the trip, and I can stay on for a holiday.”
Saying goodbye to large audiences abroad was “bittersweet to some degree,” but she won’t be giving up music altogether. Mary still does “a bit of recording here and there, collaborating with people, playing Irish gigs…there’s always something happening. It’s not like I’m sitting at home doing nothing!”
She’ll also be performing a very important gig on December 8, returning for the annual Peter McVerry Trust Christmas Carol concert in St Patrick’s Cathedral in Dublin. Meanwhile, there’s the Grandparent of the Year, which Mary hopes will “encourage other people to get more involved with their grandchildren. It’s so important, and you won’t be around forever. You have to make the effort and make the memories. I’m a grandmother and very proud of it. It’s a wonderful thing.”
Specsavers and the Beaumont Hospital Foundation are inviting people to tell them why they think their very special grandparent should be recognised as the best in Ireland. With prizes including andf iPad and Specsavers vouchers, entry details can be found at specsavers.ie