Let’s hear it for all those irresistible, smouldering older gentlemen

They’re comfy in their own skin, don’t play games and, importantly, they won’t hog the mirror. Niamh Horan on the appeal of mature men

THERE’S a pivotal scene in House of Cards where an older man, played by Kevin Spacey, warns a young reporter of the perils of falling for someone years her senior.

“You know, older men hurt you. And after they hurt you they discard you.”

And the woman still kicks her heels off.

It’s their irresistible nature, after all.

In ‘Seduction’, Giovanni Cariani painted it, Marvin Gaye broke it down in Let’s Get it On, and it has been portrayed in many guises on the big screen.

Relationships between older men and younger women have been pored over throughout history, regarded with everything from normalised acceptance right through to being mysterious and taboo.

So what is it that makes them so damn attractive?

Well for starters older men have got to know themselves that bit better, they have shed the game-playing that they used to hide behind to protect their fragile 20something egos and no longer try hard to play a part, to impress a woman.

For the same reasons, they’re typically not as vain as younger guys; they’re far more comfortable in their own skin. And no girl wants to fight her lover for the mirror. You’ll never get to the bar in that case.

They usually make great dinner dates too.

I’ve met some older men whose stories are legendary — especially if you talk to someone in a position of power or high status, which, let’s face it, is usually the case in these circumstances.

The younger guy will tell you about the time they tasted a wine, the older about the time he visited the vineyard.

At the most basic level, it’s down to what turns you on too: the young or the powerful? To grossly paraphrase Herbert Hoover, would you rather go for the young men who fight in the battle or the older man who declares the war?

Add a good sense of humour to experience and power and you’re screwed. Excuse the pun.

Some of the best jokes — all too dirty to reproduce here — I’ve heard from older men.

And then there’s the wealth — the reason most people assume a younger girl would ever go outside her dating demographic.

If you’re with them for money, you’re an asshole. In the same way that an older guy who just wants young arm candy to reclaim his youth is pathetic.

Society can rightly judge both.

Just don’t write them all off. Stereotyping people is ugly and the world is more complex than that.

Besides, when writing your life story, you should never hand someone else the pen.

You only need to look to Hollywood to see the number of legendary actors who are cast by big budget films as the perfect man to get the girl. All smouldering, older gentleman.

There is only one rule you need to follow when it comes to date or not to date: if you fall for them every time, get a good shrink. You’re obviously looking for a replacement daddy figure. But just the once? Enjoy it. You’ll have the time of your life.