Executives’ efforts command a premium
IN the Diary, we are always standing in awe of the prowess of the Executive Class, the way that they have separated themselves from the rest of our species — there is an executive version of so many things, and of course it is always better than the other version. Because that is how God has arranged it.
So we were most impressed when we saw that Time itself had been cordoned off, with an Executive version of it available behind the ropes of the White House. They call it Executive Time, that 60pc of Donald Trump’s day in which he bumps himself up to that better place, known only to the big players. The key decision-makers. In Trump’s case, the key decisions he takes during Executive Time involve watching TV and tweeting.
But hey, we have no need to be taking our cue from the executive culture of America here, not when we realise that Boris Johnson received £51,250 (€58,550)for his speech at the Pendulum Summit in Dublin’s Convention Centre — that’s the Pendulum Business and SelfEmpowerment Summit, where they declared that Boris is “one of the most captivating political speakers of his generation”. That’s why they’re getting the big bucks, and also why they’re giving the big bucks to Boris — they could have added that he has “probably done more than any other individual in Britain to reduce a oncemagnificent civilisation to a source of twisted black comedy unrivalled since the days of Albania during the 40-year rule of Enver Hoxha”.
But Self-Empowerment means that you don’t dwell on the downside. It also means that a man such as Johnson gets £51,250 rather than just the straight £50,000 — while the tabloid media focused on the big number, it was that extra £1,250 which, to the connoisseur, is truly fascinating.
I mean, you know how the world works — you say: “I’ll do it for fifty grand.” But only a special kind of man will charge fifty grand, plus £1,250, for his time.
It’s Executive Time, baby!