Not all questions are made equal

AINE O’CONNOR

IT is said that there is no such thing as a stupid question. The logic and sentiment are sound; any quest for knowledge is good, ask when you don’t know, it is better to look stupid for five minutes than to stay stupid for 50 years. The thing is, not all questions are a quest for knowledge, and the kindest thing you can say about some of them is that they are daft. It is also said, ask a stupid question and you’ll get a stupid answer.

You arrive somewhere soaked through to the skin. “Is it raining?” No, no I just swam here.

You order something not universally loved in a restaurant, let’s say squid. “Oh, do you like squid?” No, no I hate it, that’s why I picked it for my main meal of the day. Or they ask “Are you going to eat that?” God no, I was gonna stick it in my ear. Whatever those questions are about, they’re not quests for knowledge.

Some questions are not only not seeking knowledge however, they’re designed to display it. Ironically the look-how-much-I-know question and it’s desperate need to look clever can lead to some seriously stupid questions. Especially when they backfire.

I saw someone ask a tour guide why there was a photograph of Pavarotti with Shostakovich. Pavarotti being a well-known opera singer, not a chef, mechanic or astronaut, it was hardly too surprising that he might be photographed with a composer. It was a stupid question. But the question wasn’t really about Pavarotti or Shostakovich, it was about announcing the questioner as a person of tremendous knowledge of music.

It was one of many such questions that the guide had had to entertain, so it was with just the merest hint of joy that she answered, “That’s Mikhail Gorbachev.”