Dr Harry Barry on how to deal with three key emotions

Anger: “It is important to deal with anger, as devastation can occur when it is left to fester. You can manage anger by separating the behaviour of the person we believe has wronged us from the person themselves, identifying triggers that set us off and identifying the irrational beliefs and behaviours that underlie the anger.”

Shame: “The first technique for dealing with shame is to try to develop unconditional self-acceptance, where you cease rating yourself as a human being or allowing others to rate you but instead accept responsibility for yourself and/or behaviour. The second technique is to identify and deal with the unhealthy behaviours that are consolidating this sense of shame.”

Grief : “Dealing with grief involves separating the emotional component from the significant changes that occur when loss occurs in our lives.

It’s worth remembering that pain and joy go together in life. CS Lewis in A Grief Observed says: “The pain I feel now is the happiness I had before. That’s the deal.”