Not so much the FF leader as their designated driver

THE first weeks of this Government have confirmed that so many Irish stories are ultimately stories of drink — with some suggesting there will be a surge of new drink stories now that Fianna Fail are back in office, a second or even a third wave.

Not all Fianna Fail stories are ultimately stories of drink, but let’s put it this way: without drink, the story of Fianna Fail would be unimaginable.

That would be “old” Fianna Fail at any rate, elements of which seem to be hanging on with some tenacity.

Which helps to explain why a cohort within the party has always been uncomfortable about Micheal Martin.

I recall a few years ago during a difficult time for the party — a story of drink, of course — he was caught on camera, eating an apple.

There was Martin, and him eating his apple, not so much the future leader of Fianna Fail as the designated driver.

No surprise then, that Martin was the man who brought in the smoking ban.

And now he is Taoiseach as we face the fact that even in a pandemic, so many Irish stories are ultimately stories of drink. Yes, it’s all about the pubs now, we have to choose once more between the drink in its natural habitat, and whatever is the opposite of the drink — the apple, if you like.

But in the strangest twist of all, we have a Fianna Fail Taoiseach who is known to favour the apple.

Sorry, I just can’t call this one.

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Some might find it strange then, that the first minister to be found asleep in the new Dail, is a Green.

But those of us who have studied these phenomena would know that members of the major parties probably wouldn’t bother showing up at all, if they were suffering from... fatigue.

Say, for example, there’s a Fianna Fail or Fine Gael luncheon, and it is going particularly well — you won’t find many of them dragging themselves away from all that, and into the chamber. Such is the value that they place on the work/life balance, often in these situations they will choose life.

And who could blame them? And who could blame Eamon Ryan either?

Indeed, some would applaud Ryan for making it into his seat in the first place, for declining to ringfence some downtime for himself on days when he’s feeling a bit weary.

Yes the “optics” were poor — the fact that those who were awake were talking about a living wage, and that Ryan then voted against it, was about as poor as the “optics” can get.

He needs to explain that one immediately.

But given that almost no normal person has ever managed to remain fully conscious for an entire episode of Oireachtas

Report, he hardly needs to explain anything else.