The joys of Valentine's
February 10th, 9am at St Catherine’s Catholic Co Educational Secondary School morning assembly, all 6th Year students, pale, tired and totally washed out after the “Pres” were hopefully awaiting some encouraging words from Sr. Frances (AKA Dear Frankie).
She didn’t disappoint, after going on about effort, hard work, good study practices, expectations of wonderful results, she said that with the approach of mid term break, we should leave the worries behind and recharge the batteries for the final onslaught.
She announced that the school’s 6th annual dance would be held on Friday, February 28th and then Sr Mary Immaculata moved in to tell us that in a new departure, she would provide an “Etiquette Class” - a new experiment for the Leaving Cert male students to prepare them for the upcoming dance. After all, she gleefully squealed “grace and manners will lead you on the right path to the Almighty One”. She obviously hadn’t seen Janie Ryan and Billy Burke snogging behind the Sports Shed - wonder what path they are on?
We all trooped out, the boys looking as if they were on the path to salvation and the girls giggling as to how the forthcoming Etiquette Class would impact on the upcoming dance.
Alas, for me the Pres were now but a dream. Now I was faced with two bigger trials - Valentine’s Day and the bloody annual dance. Well Valentine’s Day, I could probably overcome by sending myself a card, but there was no way I could ask myself to the dance.
Part of the problem is my twin sister. She doesn’t mean to be a problem. In fact, she is so gentle that it’s probably inconceivable to her that I would consider her a problem.
I’m Maria, the proverbial “Ugly Duckling”, obviously left behind in the swan transformation process and Susie, well Susie was born looking not just sweet and engaging, but so pretty a proper Shirley Temple. Twins - obviously fraternal, not identical.
With the forthcoming dance looming, I start thinking of potential suitors, as the boys will be classified. Susie is probably at this stage in a Jane Bennett mode with a full dance card.
My heart flutters every time I see Jamie Spillane, the unassuming heart throb of St Catherine’s. He is just lovely, not just in physique and brooding looks, but genuinely well mannered. My practical conversations have all amounted to “Hi Jamie” and his deep “Hi Maria”, whereas my imaginary ones would fill a library shelf of romantic novels. He gave me a toffee one day at the lunch table, I have it safely stored in my music box and every now and then, I take it out for a sniff.
At the other end of the scale is Danny Browne, my neighbour three doors down. Talk about the original geek, intellectually brilliant and a kind hearted soul, but is probably totally unaware of love hearts, red roses and cards.
Valentine’s Day arrives, I rush down the stairs to be greeted by a huge bunch of daffodils on the hall table which Dad has obviously acquired for Mam. Can’t nature be so bountiful, as can Mrs Cassidy’s flourishing garden next door?
Among the dozen or more cards addressed to Susie, I rescue my lone self inflicted card.
And then I spy it, a cream embossed card, trimmed with gold and written in italic script -Annual Dance Invitation.
“Oh My God”, as I clutch it to my heart. With trembling fingers I gently release the flap, hold the card in my hand and read
“I Jamie Spillane request the pleasure of Susie Morrison as my partner to St Catherine’s Annual School Dance on February 28th”.
The rest fades away in a blur of tears. I carefully replace the card in the envelope for my darling gentle sister.
After all - the imponderable - who can solve a problem like Maria?”
Well look at the positives - Sr. Mary Immaculata’s Etiquette experiment has worked and I shall go to the ball - with Danny Browne, my neighbour three doors down, although I will have to issue the invitation myself.
The swan awaiting transformation and the original geek, as Dad says, every old shoe meets an old sock. In this case, two very odd socks.