SMOKES& DAGGERS

PAT KENNY began to address Joan Burton as ‘Jánaiste’ on his radio show this week before correcting himself. The Plank was halfway to ‘Joanaiste’, a coinage that might well have stuck. Perhaps he was groping for the down-with-the-kids ‘Joanster’. Or maybe he was subconsciously thinking ‘Yawnaiste’. NO FEWER than three Green Party politicians, comparing notes on Twitter this week, discovered that they had all fallen foul of bicycle thieves. Ciarán Cuffe’s machine was nicked somewhere in Dublin city, Mark Dearey’s vanished from George’s Street and John Gormley’s from his own front garden. Is there something

sinister going on? Or is it merely that the Greens can afford a better class of bike?

RICHARD BRUTON posted a picture on Twitter of himself, Bono and IDA chief Martin Shanahan, the man who was plied with a series of stupid questions on US TV this week about why Ireland didn’t still use sterling. The Jobs Minister

commented: ‘[It] Was great to catch up with the famous guy from the Squawk Box interview.’ And Bono… isn’t he the guy who thinks we pay our taxes in guilders?

BRUTON wasn’t the only one displaying a hitherto-unsuspected sense of humour: Sinn Féin PR guy Seán Mac Brádaigh, remarking on the counterproductive nature of the Sunday Indo’s campaign to embarrass the party over the past few weeks, tweeted: ‘Word is that Sinn Féin activists will be selling

copies of the Sindo door-to-door this Sunday to see if they can get party ratings up to 30%.’

BOYS will be boys, even when they’re supposed to be grown-up businessmen. The Bridge, the Ballsbridge pub coowned by a syndicate of rugby stars, enjoyed a bonanza from its proximity to the Web Summit this week. It tweeted: ‘Tabling a motion that we make the #WebSummit a weekly thing.’ But the lads’ thoughts immediately drifted to surfing of a different kind. ‘Make sure you get @AnastasiaAshley in for a drink!’ tweeted Rob Kearney, followed by Jamie Heaslip: ‘I’ll second that motion.’ Ashley, left, is a professional surfer.