SMOKES & DAGGERS

TRANSCRIPTS of phone conversations between Tony Blair and Bill Clinton were published this week. They reveal, among other things, that during the peace process the then Taoiseach was referred to as ‘Bertie’ and the Sinn Féin leader was ‘Gerry’, whereas the UUP and DUP leaders were ‘Trimble’ and ‘Paisley’. Smokes is reminded of the time in the 1980s when Irish Independent Editor Vinnie Doyle sat down with Charles Haughey. The Fianna Fáil leader wanted to know why, in Indo page one headlines, he was referred to as ‘Haughey’ whereas the Fine Gael leader was called the friendlier-sounding ‘Garret’. Doyle replied with the prosaic truth that, at the required point size, they couldn’t fit the word ‘Fitz-Gerald’ in a page one headline. After a pause, an unimpressed Haughey replied: ‘You must be f***ing joking’.

LIMERICK councillor Richard O’Donoghue, formerly of Fianna Fáil, is running as an independent candidate for the Dáil – and he has formidable assistance in the form of a campaign song written by his wife’s cousin. An online video of the song, which plays alongside photos of Mr O’Donoghue mingling with constituents and sitting on a tractor ploughing a field, has proved a surprise hit. Here’s a lyrical sample:

Come out and fight for Limerick, for limerick is the one.

Come out and vote for Limerick, give O’Donoghue your No. 1.

He stands up for the young and old, he strives for equality.

He works to preserve our heritage, he fights for you and me.

There’s one thing about O’Donoghue, he’ll never let you down.

His head is not up in the cloud, it’s definitely on the ground.

How could you not vote for him?

GERRY ADAMS really needs to give his tweets a quick proof-read before posting them. He tweeted on Friday: ‘At Save Moore St Rally. Govt shud build 1917 Quarter 2 honour 1916 men & women, not a shopping mall.’ In fairness, it’s only January and some of us are bored with Centenary events already. Maybe it would be good to celebrate much-neglected 1917 instead?