Madonna’s awful but I still feel sorry for her
MOTHER’S Day might mean breakfast in bed for many women but this must be an awful day for Madonna – a painful reminder of son Rocco’s long absence. The tug of love between her and ex husband Guy Richie is not going her way and, if Paddy Power opened a book, the odds are that the 15-year-old will have his wish to remain with his father.
The rejection must be heartbreaking for Madonna, especially with all the publicity and also because living apart from your child is hard enough if they are in the next village or town but the loss is magnified when they are in a different time zone.
And, to make matters worse, Rocco has made his preference hurtfully plain.
Many parents tell of how raising teenagers gives rise to grey hairs and sleepless nights but Madonna has suffered a masterclass in the trials of the teenage years.
She knows how one day you are the centre of your child’s world and the next day you’re the evil witch, the sole obstacle standing between them and a good time.
The furious rows, the insults, the burning truths that are just a little too close to home – Madonna experienced them all before Rocco took the drastic step of leaving home.
This week, the judge hinted at another aspect of the custody case that can only add to her nightmare. He mentioned David Banda, the son she and Ritchie adopted, and a dispute as to how his trips to England happen.
The possibility of her second son following in Rocco’s footsteps must weigh heavily on her now.
IF Madonna were a run-ofthe mill celebrity, her ordeal would attract compassion. But as larger-than-life Madonna, her anguish is immaterial. Just the inevitable reap-what-you-sow parental outcome for a mother who has embarrassed her son once too often, cavorting on the stage in fishnets and bondage gear, while running after toyboys half her age.
She is not dignified in middle age but then what rock or pop star, male or female, desperately clinging to their glory days, is?
In any case, none of it precludes her from loving her son and wanting what’s best for him, even though her hands are utterly tied. She’s at loggerheads with his father, so she can’t depend on his support, which is crucial for wayward teens.
She recently made her feelings clear at a concert when she said: ‘I’m looking for a husband, not a c***. I already married a c***.’
It is worth noting that Ritchie displayed his contempt for her when they were together, openly sneering at her performance style and personality during a documentary about her career.
It might also be worth noting that he profited handsomely from her success.
Contrary to his claims that he wanted nothing of Madonna’s fortune when they split, estimates put the settlement at £50m, with Madonna’s spokesman saying it was one of the largest payouts ever.
It must seem to Madonna that Ritchie has won once again with Rocco.
But so much for mothers or fathers; their interests are secondary to what’s best for their offspring and a child of Rocco’s age has, rightly, considerable sway in disputes.
It’s normal for a teenage son to want to spend more time with his father. But his relationship with his mother doesn’t have to be a casualty of his moving house or of the poison that exists between his parents.
He seems to have inherited his mother’s defiant spirit.
Let’s hope he has also got her independent streak. If so, he might rise above the embarrassing court case and realise that, for all their differences, his mother loves him dearly and misses him every day.