I’m longing to switch but Sky’s holding me prisoner

Poor speeds, poor coverage and penalties for loyal customers…

Yep, I’ve just been shopping around for the best TV, broadband and phone bundle. Sky offers the cheapest deal (for the next few days) but I am already a Sky customer. So guess who is specifically excluded from this €49 deal?

Yes, muggins here, and all the other loyal Sky customers. Grrrrr.

It’s only there to lure newbies onto Sky’s books.

I know this is how the system works – switch or lose. But it never fails to annoy when you, the loyal customer, are excluded from the best deals. Why do Sky – and the other firms, in fairness – all have to keep us on a never-ending merry-go-round of switching? It’s because 85% of us don’t have the time or can’t be bothered switching and so will ramp up company profits.

Anyway, I got onto Switcher (Bonkers.ie is good too) and saw Vodafone was the next cheapest after Sky.

I signed up. But then the guy got back to say that the broadband cable, which is also used for the

TV signal, is too slow to offer both – just 15Mbps (see above).

They don’t offer a TV service in my area. And it was the same story with Virgin. It’s not like I live in Timbuktu. It’s Clontarf – three miles from Dublin city centre. My sympathies to those who are struggling with what must be atrocious broadband in really remote areas.

If I want decent TV coverage, we’re reliant on satellite services. And the best Sky could offer was €75 a month for ‘triple play.’ I’m still mulling it over.

With slow broadband I can’t stream video content, at least not in a serious way.

I could get a satellite TV box and free telly for life. This could be combined with broadband and phone from Vodafone for €25 a month initially, rising to €50.

But that’s only €25 a month cheaper than what Sky are offering me for all three. When I rang them they also said they would install a phone line for free as the old one has gone dead. Hmmmmm.

I’m a huge Game Of Thrones fan – ‘Winter is coming!’ – and Sky’s fancy TV platform features also have me hooked. (Virgin and Vodafone’s may be great too but, apparently, I can’t try them out).

So, with extreme begrudgery, reluctance and annoyance, I will probably stick with Sky and cough up.

Like 30% of the country, I remain a prisoner to poor broadband coverage.

Bah!