Shaking hands and hugging is ‘creeping back into funerals’
FUNERAL directors around the country have raised concerns that mourners are becoming increasingly lax about social distancing at services.
The latest guidelines allow for a limit of 50 people attending a funeral home or any ceremony with social distancing.
But undertakers nationwide have observed hugging and shaking hands creeping in at services in recent weeks.
‘We’ve noticed in the last three weeks or so people aren’t as careful with social distancing,’ said Mary Cunniffe, public relations officer of the Irish Association of Funeral Directors (IAFD).
In a conference call this week with funeral directors from the association, she said it was noted that social distancing guidelines aren’t being adhered to as strictly in recent weeks than at the height of the pandemic.
‘The people who were on the calls from around the country noticed that hugging and shaking hands was starting to creep back,’ she said. ‘I’ve found the families themselves are very good about doing the right thing but there are some people attending the funeral who can fail to observe the guidelines.
‘It’s only human nature but so much good work has been done, it would be a shame if all that was spoiled and the virus was spread as a result of a gathering at a funeral.’
Ms Cunniffe, who is the manager of Massey Bros Funeral Directors in Templeogue, Co. Dublin, said solidarity shown by communities lining the streets has been hugely comforting to many.
She added: ‘The families have been so touched by the amount of friends and neighbours that made the effort to come in force from their homes and pay their respects on the morning of the funerals.’
But she revealed the profession was starting to see people coming out in bigger numbers in certain areas. ‘Funerals are such a social occasion that we’re kind of afraid that once they open up the numbers that it will become more of a social gathering again,’ Ms Cunniffe said. ‘There is an element that it is just that bit safer now and people are letting their guard down.
‘We want to reinforce that you don’t have to hug and shake hands with the family to know they have your support. A nod will do or a virtual hug. It’s just to remind people that’s what they have to do.’
Sadly, at the height of the pandemic many families who lost loved ones were unable to have any mourners attend the funeral due to Covid restrictions.
‘In my experience, where possible, we tried to have a service for the family,’ said the Dublin funeral director.
‘There were very, very few who were totally on their own, and that would have been due to family having underlying conditions, cocooning or being unable to travel.’
She believes the families who buried loved ones during the pandemic, especially relatives who died from Covid-19, are going through a different type of grief.
‘There’s the grieving for the loss of their loved one and the grieving for not being able to be there or to hold their loved one and say their final goodbye.’
Like so many businesses, Ms Cunniffe revealed it’s been a very tough time for the funeral profession. ‘Our service is so much a personal service and we couldn’t give that empathy or support through a cup of tea or a shake of the hand,’ she said. ‘It was hard to deal with families in that way. We’re a caring profession and not to be able to give the family that care when they need it, is so unnatural for us.’