What’s the real price of Linda’s true love?

EASTENDERS

There are lots of things women might do to try to win back the man in their life, but ditching their Quality Street garb to start dressing like an upmarket tramp and not washing your hair is not up there in terms of most popular wooing techniques. Despite Linda telling Annie she’s determined to win back Mick, you can’t help feeling that nothing short of an appearance on What Not To Wear is going to give her a snowball’s chance.

Enjoying some down-time together, Linda decides to declare her undying love for Mick (both pictured), but will it be enough? Dressed like that, the only thing she’ll win is a dedicated spot under the Arches.

With Mick saying he’ll attend Linda’s addiction meetings to support her, Janine is propelled into super paranoid mode and offers Linda £25k to leave Walford. Given the amount Linda’s drinking, £25k won’t be enough to see her through the Jubilee weekend. And from where is Janine going to get the money? The plot thickens.

Frankie is keen on creating a photography portfolio, and when

Rocky suggests she try to capture the real East End, she takes a picture of him by the car lot. The results are not good (I could have told her what they’d be before she’d even clicked) and so she photographs Mick in the

Vic. Suffice it to say she’s no David Bailey.

Callum is once again in severe frowning mode, despite Ben insisting that the kiss with Lewis meant nothing — in Soapland, always a euphemism for it meant everything and this is The End for us and, sure enough, Callum breaks up with him. After a chat with Lewis, he changes his mind but warns Ben that a repeat performance really will mean The End. Come on, Callum; you haven’t smiled since autumn 2021, and even then it looked as if pliers were the only means that brought it about.