Wellbeing & Meditation

MANY things affect our wellbeing and our sense of self, freedom and who we are every day. Bullying is one of those things. It can affect anyone and happen almost anywhere–in the playground, at school, work, in your social or sports club, at home or on online.

Bullying is a very serious matter and can have lasting and devastating consequences.

There are many myths and misunderstandings around bullying. If you feel you are being bullied, it is important to read up on it and know your rights and the facts. Victims of bullying often don’t report it. They feel bad, embarrassed, confused and just want to get away from it.

There are usually witnesses to bullying. If unaddressed, it has significant consequences for life–loneliness, isolation, depression, eating disorders, PTSD and even thoughts of and suicide. It can have lasting and devastating consequences so should be dealt with swiftly and effectively.

At work, bullying is classified as: “repeated inappropriate behaviour, direct or indirect, whether verbal, physical or otherwise, conducted by one or more persons against another or others, at the place of work and/ or in the course of employment, which could reasonably be regarded as undermining the individual‘s right to dignity at work.” (Health and Safety Authority)

The main types of bullying include:

Verbal– includes name-calling, put downs, slagging, threats and sexual harassment.

Physical – includes being punched, tripped, kicked and having your things stolen or damaged and sexual abuse

Social– includes being left out, excluded, ignored or having rumors spread about you.

Psychological- includes intimidation, stalking, manipulation, dirty looks and or unpredictable reactions.

Online bullying- includes offensive and abusive messages, hacking into accounts and or spreading rumors online.

Employers have duties related to bullying because they have to provide a safe space to work. Just Today, I heard of someone that left their job before Christmas because they were being bullied. They spoke to their boss and they responded: ‘What do you expect me to do about it”? and through their hands up helplessly. This is an example of how an employer shouldn’t handle it. And the person was not clear on their rights and their employer’s responsibilities either.

If you feel you are being bullied, it is important first to assess what is happening objectively so you can solve it and that you have a clear case if you choose to escalate it. The following steps will help you do this:

- Research the matter and policies in place – nationally and in your workplace including your organisations “Anti-bullying policy”

- Check in with yourself ? Are you being objective or are you taking things personally?

- Is there a basis to it ? eg work-related non-performance

- Is there a personality ‘clash’?

- Is it a repeated pattern of behaviour, picking you out, deliberately and offensively?

- Document what is happening

To accuse someone of bullying is also a serious matter and should be done carefully.

People who bully have low self-esteem, are jealous and use bullying to make themselves feel better and distract themselves from their own insecurities. They feel less than in some way and project that. It is not because of what the other person has done or not done. Bullying is a learned behaviour.

While there aren’t up to date statistics on bullying in the workplace, it is on the up in schools. We can draw inferences from that.

If you are being bullied, or if you are an employer it is important to take a strong stand on it. As an employer, the wellbeing and productivity of your most important asset depends on it.