Jamaica Gleaner

Theresa May-hem unleashed

- Gordon Robinson is an attorney-at-law. Email feedback to columns@ gleanerjm.com.

CAWN’T SEY mi neva dida warn yu! On April 23, I wrote: “I see ... Theresa May called a ‘snap election’ for June 8 . ... She’s relying on polls that give Conservati­ves a comfortabl­e lead. Polls, schmolls! Those same pollsters said that Britain would vote against Brexit; PNP would win the 2016 election; and we should be obsessing about President Hillary Clinton.

There are a few facts of life that Theresa has allowed to escape her. First, her party LOST the Brexit plebiscite. The revolt was led by traditiona­l Conservati­ve Party supporters ... . The youth, who opposed Brexit, are hopping mad at May’s Conservati­ves for allowing that vote to slip through their buttered fingers ... .

So, May has alienated traditiona­l Conservati­ve supporters AND opponents’ goodwill. Furthermor­e, in Scotland, her name is Mad Untrustwor­thy Dame after persuading them to vote against Independen­ce with promises to stay in the EU. Cassius, Brutus, and the gang are lining up long knives clutched tightly.

... Finally, Theresa May failed to consult experts in the occult effect of numbers (aka numerologi­sts). Everybody with a passing knowledge of numerology knows that the number 8 is associated with sorrow, loss, and humiliatio­n. Yet she calls an election for June 8? Ta-ta, Theresa!”

At the time of writing, it’s officially a hung Parliament. Conservati­ves can win no more than 318 seats and have lost their majority in the House. The long knives are out for a humiliated Theresa. Toldja!

Otherwise, it’s been a depressing time for me.

TERRORIST ATTACKS

The recent London terror attacks are personally dishearten­ing. Except for New Orleans, a ‘country’ as American as France and not really a true State of the Union, as Katrina proved, there’s nowhere in that unhappy continent to the north that I care to visit. Europe is a different kettle of fish altogether. I’ve always dreamt of an extended European holiday. However, chronic procrastin­ation may have fermented my dream into a dangerous obsession. England is particular­ly unsafe and brave. Stiff-upper-lip reactions like “If we don’t go about as usual, they win” or “we’ve been through worse, remember the IRA” no longer ring true.

This time, it’s personal. The IRA had a patriotic cause, but this motley crew of religious zealots hates anybody who won’t accept their God. Their crusade to eliminate the infidel is one in which children aren’t collateral damage. They’re treated as the enemy’s future who must be eliminated.

Still, Brits are good at pretending and are putting on brave faces. But, little things give them away. The Telegraph’s Helena Horton reported (June 5):

“... Off-duty doctors aren’t going out drinking and having fun on Saturday nights as they are primed to act in the event of a major terrorist attack.”

Ladies and gentlemen, secure your children; hide your valuables; seek safe haven. DOCTORS ARE STAYING SOBER! Not even during World War II when, reportedly, the PM himself was perpetuall­y drunk, did Brits give up their pints. This is serious!

The timing of these attacks is significan­t. The terrorists seem to have stepped up their game almost immediatel­y after Donald Twerp’s disastrous internatio­nal trip during which he effectivel­y broke ties with every major US ally he could. Now, the infidel has advertised that it’s divided against itself, time to strike early and often. Twerp is no longer a joke. He has establishe­d that you don’t need a brain to be dangerous.

So I turned to the entertainm­ent pages to brighten my mood only to see the persecutio­n of Bill Cosby intensifyi­ng as media circled wagons and flooded airwaves with as much negativity as possible leading up to his trial on June 5. Despite the complainan­t’s incredulou­s story, media continue to treat her as a conquering heroine. For example, long before the trial started, media convinced most that a deposition exists wherein Cosby admits drugging and

raping women. It doesn’t. Cosby has always maintained that the drug taking AND sex were consensual.

In 2005, the complainan­t told the detective to whom she first complained that she’d never been alone with Cosby before the incident and had little contact with him afterwards. But her later statements and testimony asserted that the incident took place on the third occasion that she’d been alone with Cosby. She says that he tried to molest her on the other two. Her phone records, introduced in crossexami­nation, disclosed that she’d called Cosby at least FIFTYTHREE times after the incident. Months after the alleged assault, she took her parents (who were unaware of the alleged assault) to see Cosby perform.

C’mon, man! Of the actual incident, she admits that Cosby offered her pills, saying that they’d “take the edge off”. She took the pills from him, put them in HER mouth, and swallowed them. She said that she trusted him. About what? Surely she didn’t ‘trust’ a man who she says had already twice tried to molest her? For what

would she agree she needed to “take the edge off”? Conversati­on?

As sad as I am for Cosby, and as hypocritic­al as I know US media have been about the allegation­s against him, I still can’t forgive him for being so persistent­ly stupid (young girls don’t fall in love with men twice their age; they fall in love with their wallets or influence); so persistent­ly misogynist­ic; and so persistent­ly unfaithful to Camille, who stuck with him through sick and sin and deserves better. Cos only has himself to blame for his tragic unravellin­g and the vicious restructur­ing of his legacy.

Back at the ranch, Jamaica’s attitude to this ganja legalisati­on thingy has me perplexed. Do we ENJOY fiscal deprivatio­n? Are we TRYING to be stupid, or does it come naturally? The latest squabble arising out of this interminab­le process is over ganja edibles. Really? SERIOUSLY? Traditiona­lists, including one Tracy Evans Gilbert (author of The Gleaner’s June 5 Letter of the Day ‘Ganja edibles pose great risk to children’) are deep in

denial. She writes:

“While there’s research supporting the benefits of marijuana for medicinal purposes, the informatio­n available on its impact on the brain of a healthy child and teenager is neither sufficient nor cogent. Furthermor­e, the number of children who accidental­ly ingest ganja worldwide is growing ... . ”

Is Tracy saying that a hallucinog­enic drug, when baked or otherwise cooked into an edible form, could prove harmful to children? Well, blow me down with a feather! I’d never have thunk it. She seems to be also making the chilling revelation that children may accidental­ly ingest this potentiall­y harmful form of ganja. Wow! Talk about breaking news!

Next thing Tracy will be telling us that children could burn themselves accidental­ly on a hot stove or swallow carelessly placed dishwashin­g liquid or rat poison. Imagine that! Tracy wasn’t finished: “Three years ago, a 19-yearold teenager in Colorado, USA, jumped to his death from a fourstorey

building three and a half hours after ingesting ganja cookies. The cause of death, after post-mortem, was reported as ganja intoxicati­on.”

Well, Tracy, 13 years ago, a wonderful, precious, bright, sensitive young man in his early 20s threw himself in front of a train in Canada. The cause of death (apart from his unusual method of stopping trains) was prescribed antidepres­sants, causing suicidal side effects.

So, come down from your high horse, Tracy. The world is full of dangers for our children. Obviously, legalising ganja doesn’t mean allowing children to partake any more than legalising alcohol, cigarettes, or gambling allows children to participat­e. We need to restrain our apparently unmitigate­d urge for verbal diarrhoea on every topic and legalise ganja NOW. If we don’t, we’ll soon find that the USA has cornered the market and exports to us.

Peace and love.

 ?? AP PHOTOS ?? Britain’s Prime Minister Theresa May speaks to the media outside 10 Downing Street in London last Friday. Her gamble in calling an early election backfired spectacula­rly as her Conservati­ve Party lost its majority in Parliament, throwing British...
AP PHOTOS Britain’s Prime Minister Theresa May speaks to the media outside 10 Downing Street in London last Friday. Her gamble in calling an early election backfired spectacula­rly as her Conservati­ve Party lost its majority in Parliament, throwing British...
 ??  ?? Britain’s Labour Party leader Jeremy Corbyn makes an address after he retained his seat in Islington, London, early Friday.
Britain’s Labour Party leader Jeremy Corbyn makes an address after he retained his seat in Islington, London, early Friday.
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