It doesn’t add up

AFTER A couple of weeks talking about language proficiency, I’m in the mood to talk in terms of numbers. Here are the numbers that defined the week for me as a spectator of the news flowing out of our beautiful little island.

ZERO (0)

Zero! That’s the rating out of 10 I had given to education and information minister Ruel Reid after just one year in office. That was an error on my part, because that evaluation has now robbed me of the opportunity to reduce his rating even further – unless we are accepting negative grades.

I’ve written about the slow-moving fiasco that’s happening in the traditional top-tier schools, where the administration’s strategy of doublespeak, deliberate ambiguity, and policy confusion regarding parental contribution is wreaking havoc. It’s an odd social conscience, though not unheard of, that sets about to achieve ‘equity’ by destroying what’s good instead of improving what’s bad.

In another instance of staggering incompetence, Ruel has made such a complete hash of the PEP (Primary Exit Profile implementation that The Gleaner threw a wikkid lick to correct him. It reminded me of a time when I saw a man in Westmoreland slap another with a machete. The lick echoed through the hills and you just knew it would leave a mark.

“The charitable characterisation of Ruel Reid’s report of last month on results of the mock exams by students preparing for the new Primary Exit Profile (PEP) is to say that the education minister was disingenuous ... For anyone who listened to Mr Reid at that press conference, and took him at face value, would have been left with the impression that ... things were not all that bad ... We had thought that the outcomes revealed by Mr Reid were abysmal. We were wrong. They were worse – once bared of the façade of disingenuity constructed by the minister ...”.

Sadly, Ruel deserves the lick. In one disastrous public-relations stunt, he has decisively undermined his credibility in both portfolios he holds.

FOUR (4)

That’s the percentage of students who sat the mock exams for the Primary Exit Profile (PEP) and achieved the minimal standard in maths. Of the 37,539 students who sat the examination, only 1,379 met the standard. For every hundred students whose mothers are waking them up each morning, shining them off, dressing them, providing transport and lunch money, and delivering them into the hands of the State to be taught some math and get a real chance at life, only four are meeting minimal standards.

FIVE (5)

The percentage of those detained under the state of emergency in St James who are actually charged with anything. Of the 4,085 detained, only 153 have been charged – as The Gleaner notes – “mainly with minor offences”. Bear in mind that the average time of detention is four days, so this is a major disruption in the lives of the detainees.

I don’t think we could conceive of a better process to de facto criminalise and poison the minds of these nearly 4,000 youths. We have detained then released them like inconsequential animals.

ONE HUNDRED AND FIVE (105)

The number of children detained by the state of emergency in St James.

The Public Defender, Arlene HarrisonHenry, points out the basic backwardness of the kind of policing going on here:

“The detentions are arbitrary and mainly random, without any legal basis and aimed at [a] particular group of youths in certain communities.”

In the book of Hosea, this is called “sowing the wind”.

SEVEN HUNDRED AND SEVENTY-TWO (772)

The number of traffic tickets one driver had when he was eventually arrested by personnel from the Public Safety and Traffic Enforcement Branch. Another guy had 751 tickets.

First, I want to personally thank the authorities for releasing this information because I haven’t had a good belly-laugh for a while now.

Work with me here: you have to imagine this taximan committing hundreds of offences for every time he was actually stopped and being stopped at least 10 times for every time the policeman even bothered to give him a ticket. Each stop and each ticket takes resources. Some policeman took the time and made the effort, then some clerk duly entered it into the records. No doubt there were court dates and warrants.

By my observation, a lot of what passes for ‘’work’ in the managerial and administrative class is much ado about nothing, but that’s not supposed to be the case with the cops. As underpaid public servants, it would be best if they weren’t involved in such obvious futility.

SEVENTEEN MILLION (17,000,000)

The number of dollars it takes to erect a ‘Welcome to Montego Bay’ sign. I don’t know enough about the business of erecting signs to join in the outrage, but it does seem monumental. That’s going to be some great sign.

EIGHT HUNDRED MILLION (800,000,000)

The number of dollars announced for Christmas bushing. Along with sorrel, rumcake, Salvation Army collection drives, and Christmas tunes on the radio, this is a long and strong tradition now, and it’s time bushing got some recognition and respect. I’m doing my little bit here, but everyone has to pitch in and support this national priority. As is plain, in many respects, it exceeds our commitment to education, health, and law enforcement.

So what may we conclude from all these numbers? Our national collective effort seems to concentrate on producing a bunch of antisocial illiterates ripe for being mishandled and locked up for no reason by the police. Eventually, they may get a little work driving a taxi on one of those law-free zones formerly known as roads. But all is not lost. To secure votes and give them the power to buy likkle rum come Christmas time, bushing work will proceed with ordained regularity.

I suppose you could say it doesn’t add up. Or is like what they’re saying on the Internet, that Jamaica could never be a real place?

I Daniel Thwaites is an attorney-at-law. Email feedback to columns@gleanerjm.com.